Baby Uke's?
by loverofakatsuki
Summary: Deidara, Tobi, and Olivia are forced to being treated like babies by Hidan, Sasori, and Zetsu; who are acting like parents due to a jutsu. Then somehow everyone else gets involved! LEMONS/YAOI Multi-pairings Dei,Tob,Hida,Saso,Zets,Kaku,Kisa,Itac
1. Day 1

***I know this is a weird ass story and three characters are SO OOC, but I had to write this. I dreamed the idea last night and laughed my ass off so I HAD to put it on fanfic. Review and let me know what you think ^-^***

"You're leaving for how long?" Kakuzu smirked, "I've already told you, it's going to be at least five days." Kakuzu, Kisame, and Itachi had to go on a mission that was pretty far out and we were saying our farewells.

Hidan tackled him in a hug, "You better fucking come back in one piece old man." Kakuzu rolled his eyes and patted his head, "I will you moron."

"Don't get frisky with Itachi and Kisame now." He cocked an eyebrow then gave me a rough kiss from my comment and then kissed Hidan. With that done, all three left. I know it wasn't a big deal to fuss over but, I was going to miss him.

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><p><span>Day 1<span>

Deidara, Tobi and I were in the living room playing cards when Sasori, Hidan, and Zetsu came in carrying a bunch of bags. I thought they just had a meeting session but it looks like they went out afterwards.

It was something about an experimental jutsu but I didn't know the details. For some reason when they entered, the atmosphere was feeling…..off.

Deidara and Tobi sensed it too and stared at them as I was. You don't have to be a ninja to get a bad feeling. We tried to ignore them and go back to our game, which I lost. "Damn." Hidan came over and popped me on the cheek, "Hidan, what was that for?"

It didn't hurt but I was surprised as hell he did that. "You should know better than to curse like that." I didn't answer and just stared in complete shock. "Are you feeling ok Hidan un?"

Sasori stroked his lover's hair and smiled, "Of course he is Deidei, now you be a good boy and play nicely." Deidara gave his Danna the exact same expression I had and was flabbergasted. Tobi was just as confused as we were and tried to stand up when Zetsu gently pushed him back down.

"Zetsu, why you won't let Tobi get up? He want to get a drink." Zetsu just spoke softly, "No I'll go get it Tobi." **"I don't want you to hurt yourself." **"That's a good idea Zetsu, is my girl thirsty?" I nodded somewhat and so did Deidara just to get them to leave. All three seme's left to go get us a drink and left us freaked out.

"Did I miss something? Is this some kind of joke they're playing?" "I have no idea and I don't like it un." "Tobi scared. They are NOT themselves." "They're like totally different people."

Deidara knitted his eyebrows in thought, "Do you think it has to do something with that experimental jutsu they did earlier un?" "That has to be it Sempai!" "What do we do about it then?"

He shrugged, "I guess just go along with it un." They came back. Hidan put the drink on the table and then pulled me onto his lap in another chair. I tried to get the drink but he took it from me and held it to my lips, "No, you're not big enough to do it by yourself yet babe. Let me do it for you."

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><p>He's talking to me like I'm a toddler. Deidara and Tobi were getting the same treatment as I was too. What the hell is going on? I was getting annoyed, "Will you just fucking stop Hidan?" He tsked, "What have I told you about cursing?"<p>

I made a face and hopped out of his lap, "Who the hell are you and where is Hidan?" He frowned and shook his head before Deidara started. "Danna, I can do it myself un." Sasori smirked and ignored his lover's protest, "I know you think you can Deidei, but you're just not ready yet."

Deidara snapped and jumped off his lap, "What the hell is wrong with you and stop calling me Deidei damn it un!" Zetsu covered Tobi's ears like he was trying to shield him from hearing Deidara's curses.

Hidan muttered, "What am I going to do with you. I guess I have no choice but to give you some discipline." Sasori frowned, "Agreed." He took a struggling Deidara into his arms and pulled him over his lap, "This is going to hurt me more than it does you brat."

Hidan grabbed me and took the same action, "Good girls don't curse like a sailor Olivia." He yanked my lower clothes down and brought his hand down with a good hard smack. Deidara and I were getting spanked like a couple of kids!

Tobi was too scared to move and watched us get our punishment; they were hard smacks that stung badly. Hidan finally stopped and asked, "Have you learned your lesson baby?" I meekly nodded my head, just to get him to stop.

He pulled my slacks back up and kissed me on the forehead, "I have a present for my little princess." Princess? He sat me back in the chair and started fumbling through the bags. Sasori smirked, "I have something for you too Deidei." Zetsu put Tobi down and ruffled his hair before joining the other two.

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><p>Without hesitation all three of us broke to the bathroom and locked ourselves in. "Kakuzu picked a fine time to leave when we need help!" Deidara wiped the sweat from his forehead, "They're acting like they're our parents." Tobi nodded, "Tobi don't like this at all. They treating us like babies."<p>

"Whatever happened to them, it better wear off soon!" The door knob jiggled and an aggravated Zetsu spoke through the door, "Alright children, open the door." We huddled into a corner without a word and stared at the door, knowing it was going to open somehow.

"**Tobi! I'll give you to the count of three to open this door."** Tobi flinched from Zetsu's tone and buried his face against his sempai's shoulder. "One." None of us moved. **"Two."** We're doomed. "Three!" We heard some jingling keys and the door swung open to reveal three agitated men holding…no way.

With a LOT of struggling and curses, all three of us were stripped of our clothes and put into what they bought us. We were carried to the living room and were forced to sit with our 'parents.'

I was sitting on the couch in between Hidan's legs, who was grinning from ear to ear and gently pinched my cheek, "My girl looks so pretty in her little dress doesn't she?" I was in a baby pink, mini tank top nightie with fluffy edges that barely covered my behind; in which I was wearing matching lacy boy shorts. Almost a negligee I should say.

Zetsu smiled, "She's so adorable Hidan." **"Almost as cute as my little Tobi."** Tobi was wearing a solid orange, fitted t-shirt with matching boy shorts. "It matched Tobi's mask perfectly, I just had to get it." Zetsu was rocking Tobi the whole time in his chair and the poor boy didn't know what to do.

Sasori grinned, "You did do an excellent job Zetsu. Deidei, please hold still." Deidara was slumped on the floor as Sasori just finished putting a bow onto his ponytail. "There, such a beautiful boy you are. No one can resist you now."

Deidara was scowling the whole time in his 'outfit.' His was just like Tobi's except the color was baby blue. I wasn't too upset about what I was wearing but still. This situation has got to be the most ridiculous thing that has ever happened at this apartment and I knew it was only going to get worse.

I was right of course. The day was almost over and guess what us baby uke's had? Toys, stuffed animals, more clothes, and other stuff we haven't seen yet I'm sure.

We've learned rather quickly just to go endure the humiliation and make them happy. No matter what we did, we couldn't get away from the loving attention and we'd get punished severely for disobeying the rules too. Trust me, it wasn't painless.

It was about nine when Deidara, Tobi and I were playing cards on the floor when I yawned. That seemed to be what Hidan was waiting for and clapped his hands together, "Looks like my little girl is getting sleepy, time for bed." I scowled when I reached out my arms for him to pick me up, "Don't give me that face. Daddy tired too you know."

Holy mother of Jashin! Now he's my daddy? I groaned and buried my face against his neck when he carried me to his room; just when I thought it couldn't possibly get any worse…it just did. I hate to see what else they've gotten in store for us tomorrow.

**To be continued:**


	2. Day 2

Day 2

"Come on baby, it's time to get up." Hidan was trying to get me out of bed as I weakly tried to push him away, "Noooo." He jerked back the covers and picked me up (like a baby of course), "You've slept long enough."

I was still half asleep when he sat me on the couch next to Deidara, who looked half asleep too. Sasori came over and asked, "Are you two hungry?" Surprisingly both our stomachs growled at the same time, "That's answers that."

When they left to go get us something to eat we almost drifted off to sleep again. "Sempai? Olivee?" Tobi was placed next to us and tried to get us up, "Go away Tobi un." He shrugged and snuggled next to me; he was sleepy too. What time was it anyway?

"Awww, isn't that adorable?" **"Sasori, Hidan, come and see this." **"That is too cute." All three uke's were curled against each other on the couch trying to go back to sleep. Sasori just smirked, "Maybe we should've let them sleep a little longer. It is awfully early." "Nonsense, they'll wake up after they get some breakfast."

It wasn't long before they came back with 'breakfast.' I just wished we were fully awake to know what it was. Tobi was taken away to another spot and so was Deidara; I was almost asleep when they disturbed us damn it.

Hidan shifted me to where I was leaning against his shoulder and felt something press against my lips; still half asleep and didn't want to open my eyes. "Open up." I shook my head no but he stuck his finger in my mouth and then got whatever it was into it.

"You need to suck baby." I weakly did what I was told for the mere fact I was about to fall asleep again. "That's my good girl." Hidan started to rock me as I kept drinking something warm but couldn't pinpoint what it was. It took me a few minutes before realization hit me and stopped; this is milk!

I'm being rocked and drinking milk through something in my mouth? My eyes snapped open and I saw it…a baby bottle.

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><p>"AAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHH!" I knocked the bottle away kicking and smacked Hidan's face before I got away, stumbling across the room yelling, "WHY THE HELL ARE YOU MAKING ME DRINK OUT OF A DAMN BOTTLE?" Deidara and Tobi had the same reaction when they just realized this too.<p>

Talk about a bunch of curses, kicking, and yelling at the other men. Tobi had thrown the bottle at Zetsu's head and Deidara chunked his at Sasori's crotch, which blocked it just in time. "HAVE YOU THREE FUCKING LOST YOUR MINDS UN?" "WE NOT BABIES!"

Hidan threw his hands up in aggravation, "I'm so not in the mood to deal with this right now!" Sasori and Zetsu were fuming as well. "How dare you try and hit me with something Tobi!" "The same goes for you brat." Hidan quickly hopped off the couch and came at me.

I make a break for it but he caught me with ease. "Get me the paddle Sasori." SHIT! Tobi and Deidara were both were snatched up by Zetsu since they were going to get it too. "Here you go Hidan." "Thank you." Once again I was bent over his lap and got spanked, but this time with that damn paddle.

With each smack I cried out and was already crying from the pain. "How dare you slap me across the face! You do NOT smack your daddy Olivia!" He kept smacking to the point where my behind was fairly numb. "Are you going to stop being a bad girl now?" I choked back a sob, "Uh-huh." He finally stopped and tossed it to Sasori, "Your turn."

"It hurts Danna, stop un!" Sasori kept going and was practically yelling at him, "Punishment is supposed to hurt brat and if you keep this attitude up, you're going to be spanked every single hour do you understand?" Deidara frantically nodded his head yes.

Zetsu's turn, **"You're such a pain Tobi!" **"Why can't you be a good boy?" Tobi kept squirming to get away and sobbed, "Tobi IS a good boy." **"No you're not that's why you're getting punished!" **He kept smacking and Tobi finally gave up on escape, "Tobi sorry! Tobi sorry!"

Zetsu stopped and put the paddle down. "I guess that's a start." He pulled him up and pointed, **"Sit over there and behave until I tell you your timeout is over." **Sniffling with his head hung, Tobi sat in the corner without a word.

Sasori pointed as well, "I want you to sit there brat and be quick about it." Hidan dragged me to where he wanted me to be, "If I hear so much as a peep out of you you're getting spanked again understand?" I meekly nodded my head and buried my face against my knees.

We all were sat in different corners for 'timeout.' There's no way in hell we're going to be able to fight back against them; I didn't know they'd be this brutal.

My butt stung badly and I have a feeling it's bruised. I sighed and wiped my tears away; looks like we have no choice but to indulge them until the others got back.

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><p>It's been about thirty minutes when Hidan knelt beside me, "Are you ready to start behaving and not be in timeout anymore?" I nodded. "I want you to tell me, not nod." I sighed, "Yes daddy." He cockily grinned and scooped me up, "That's much better!"<p>

He sat back on the couch with me and grabbed the bottle, "I warmed it back up so you can drink the rest of it." I scowled but drank my milk thinking; someone just shoot me!

Zetsu rubbed Tobi's back and cooed, "Is my Tobi ready to be a good boy now?" Tobi whimpered yes and Zetsu tenderly took him into his arms. Deidara was still sulking as Sasori came up behind him, "Have you learned your lesson Deidei?"

"Yes un." "No more tantrums right?" "Right un." Sasori seemed pleased with that response and carried him back to the love seat. They had to finish their milk too. Once I was through Hidan kissed me on the cheek, "See, that wasn't so hard now was it?"

I bit back a snide remark and asked sweetly, "Um, can I have some pancakes?" I was very hungry. "Sure sweetie, do Deidei and Tobi want some too?" I glanced over at their pitiful expressions but they nodded.

*Well, at least we got fed real food for breakfast but we couldn't feed ourselves, they did it. Go figure. At this point I didn't care and neither did the other two, we're not going to live off milk for the next three days.

Once that was over they sat us in mine and Tobi's room. "Now, all of you stay here and be good until we get back."

"**We have a surprise for you three." **They left and locked the room to go do whatever it was. I stretched and fell back on the bed, "Aggh, I thought they'd never leave us alone!" "Tobi don't like drinking out of a bottle." "Well neither do us Tobi un!"

Tobi hung his head and I hugged him, "Tobi don't be sad." He sniffed, "Tobi not sad Olivee, his behind hurts." Deidara stood up and rubbed his own behind, "I know what you mean, that shit hurt un." I quickly got up and checked mine, "Just as I thought."

"Damn, he hit you hard un." "That and I bruise easy." "Poor Olivee." Tobi hugged me and I returned it. "What do you think this surprise is?" "I don't want to know un." As if answering our question, here they came to lead us to the living room. We stood there in complete shock and were NOT expecting this.

They had put together for us a…..playpen. "You can't be serious un?" There were toys and stuffed animals already in there for us to play with. They put us in the pen and it barely came up to our thighs.

Zetsu took charge and dished out the rules, "This is your play area and we expect you three to be on your best behavior and play nicely." **"If you don't, we'll have no choice but to punish you again." **Hidan ruffled my hair, "If you need anything let us know."

Sasori adjusted Deidara's tiny bow on his ponytail, "That includes going to the bathroom as well." We just nodded and they left the room happy as they can be. "Now I don't have to worry about my Deidei wandering off when I leave the room."

"I know, my poor Tobi's always getting hurt." "Speak for yourself Zetsu, my girl is tough like her daddy."

"This is ridiculous. We can easily get out un." Deidara went to step over the pen but stopped, "What the un?" Tobi tried too but he couldn't either, then I tried. Admitting defeat I put my hands on my hips, "That's a clever move."

"No joke un." "They put up a barrier so we couldn't get out sempai?" "Obviously Tobi un." I sat down and grabbed some crayons and a coloring book. "Olivee, you going to color?" "Yep, need to do something to pass the time."

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><p>We had no choice but either suffer extreme boredom or play with the toys. For a good while, I colored, Tobi started building a house with legos, and Deidara was creating his art with the clay. It was just normal clay, not his special stuff; Sasori took his away on day one.<p>

I was fairly enjoying myself now, especially when Tobi and I were throwing a ball back and forth against the barrier. The ball hit it like it would a wall and once it bounced everywhere above us we wrestled to get it when it came down.

After a while we finally stopped and observed Deidara's creations. "You finally made a kitty!" I picked it up gently and admired it, "Yeah yeah, leave me alone. I got tired of making the same things un." "Are you ok Tobi?"

He was fidgeting a lot and trying to keep still, "Tobi have to go." Right on cue, our seme's came back and Tobi sighed with relief, "Zetsu! Tobi got to go to the bathroom." Zetsu picked him up and led him to the desired destination.

"Looks like the only way we can get out is if they take us out." Deidara groaned, "That means we really do have to go along with this stupid crap un." I patted his hand, "Look at the bright side. You and Tobi still get to call your lovers the same thing, but I have to call Hidan daddy!"

They got him in a better mood and he joined in playing ball with me.

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><p><span>Other POV<span>

Zetsu had his back turned when Tobi done his business, but when he was through Zetsu was right behind him. "Zetsu?" He leaned down next to ear and whispered, "Does my Tobi want to feel good?" "What Zetsu mean?"

He pulled the shorts back down and stroked him. "Zetsuuuuuu." Safe to say, Tobi was NOT expecting this because of the jutsu; now he's really curious if this is only an act. "I want my Tobi to _feel _like a good boy."

Tobi was quickly getting hard from his lover's touches and starting to moan, "Don't tease Tobi!" He stroked him harder and had to hold him to keep him still, **"Does my Tobi want to cum?" **He frantically nodded his head yes.

Zetsu smirked and stroked faster, "I want you to cum for me Tobi like the good boy you are." Tobi gasped and moaned whimpering, "Tobi cum for Zetsu, he's a good boy." "Who's good boy?" "Tobi Zetsu's good boy!"

Only a few tugs more and Tobi came with a loud moan, spilling his seed all over his lover's hand. Panting in content, Tobi didn't realize Zetsu cleaning him up before he was being carried back to the other room, "Such a good boy."

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><p><span>Back in other room<span>

Zetsu choked back a laugh, along with Tobi, at the sight he was seeing. Deidara and Olivia were wrestling in the pen with Hidan and Sasori trying to separate them. "Brat, stop acting like a child and give her the clay." "I'm not done using it yet Danna un!"

"You've been playing with that damn clay this whole time and I just wanted some, not all of it!" Hidan smacked my behind and threw me over his shoulder, "I think we need to have a talk young lady!"

As he was carrying me out I glared at Deidara, "Now look what you've done! I have to hear a fucking lecture because of you."

That earned me another smack to my already aching behind. "You're the one cursing, not me un!" Before anything else could be said, I was in Hidan's room with the door shut. He sat me on the bed and brought over a chair to sit in.

"Where did you hear all these curse words?" You've got to be kidding me? "From you Hidan." "That was a long time ago and I haven't used any of those words around you and don't call me by my name!" I crossed my arms and scowled.

This jutsu is REAL piece of work; almost every word that comes out of his mouth is a curse word! This past day and a half has to be world record for him to NOT curse.

"Whatever, just DO NOT curse again alright." "I'll try." He pushed me down on the bed and straddled me, "There's no trying about it; you'll do it." "Ok Hidan."

"Stop doing that and call me daddy or my girl is going to get punished again." Just the thought of that made me wince and he noticed. "I want my girl to be happy and get rewarded for being good." I turned my head and frowned, "What reward?" Probably a doll or something.

He bent over and nibbled my neck, "I'll show you." My neck was soon attacked with nibbles and sucks with his hands caressing me all over. Ok, this is a reward I can deal with.

Apparently the jutsu didn't get rid of his lust or he wouldn't be doing this. He molded our lips together and glided his tongue in to gain dominance over my mouth.

He gently pulled down my boy shorts and reluctantly stopped kissing me. I pouted and made him smirk, "I'm going to make my girl feel good." He brought his head between my legs to carry out his proclamation. I didn't hold back my whimpers when he licked and sucked; he did it nice and slow to torture me.

He held my wrists down to keep me from squirming too much and licked faster. "H..Hidan." I groaned when he painfully nipped me and brought his head up, "What did I tell my girl earlier?" "I'm sorry." "Good, now say it right." "I'm sorry daddy."

Satisfied, he went back to what he was doing and licked harder. I couldn't hold the moans in and was already on the verge of going when he stopped again. "Don't stop daddy." Hidan chuckled and continued; he did that on purpose to test me.

I soon spasmed into an orgasm with a loud moan and watched Hidan lick his lips with a grin. "Did that feel nice?" I meekly nodded as he took out his hard member. "Daddy going to make his girl feel REAL good now."

He gently penetrated me and instead of going slow like I thought, he went hard and fast. I was practically screaming with pain and pleasure when he locked his lips onto mine to keep me quiet. I'm not a screamer but that happened so fast….literally.

"Does my girl want more?" "Y..Yes daddy, I want…more daddy!" He happily obliged and pounded me harder, "Such a naughty girl you are." "DADDY!" I shouted when I came and he followed soon after with a groan, "Oliviaaaa."

I was fairly exhausted from my 'reward' and that at least made me feel like Hidan was back to normal. After so many minutes he got up and covered himself before picking me up, "Looks like my girl needs a bath now."

**To be continued once again:**

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><p><strong>Ok readers, I've been talking with Sb30 and we've came up with an idea. <strong>

**After every new chapter there will be at least 1 question that you can answer in a review OR you can ask a question instead. **

**Then I'll post it at the beginning (and who it's from) of a new chapter and the akatsuki will comment. This is merely just for fun and you might get some interesting info!**

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><p><strong>*Example for you guys to ask: 'Has Itachi and Sasori had a fling together when no one was around?'<strong>

**Itachi:…..Why are you doing this to me? They might actually ask this!**

**Sasori: Have you lost your mind? These readers don't need to know anything about us.**

**LOA: I'm sorry but I need a laugh. I can't wait to hear what they'll ask.**

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><p><strong>*Example for me to ask: Who do you think Kakuzu would sleep with, other than his two lovers!<strong>

**Kakuzu: WTF, don't ask them that loverofakatsuki. Who knows what they'll say!**

**LOA (loverofakatsuki): Be quiet or no lemon for you later!**

**Kakuzu:…..I hate you sometimes.**

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><p><strong>Here's the question:<br>**

***Which 3 akatsuki members do you think has the biggest cocks?* **

**I'll give my opinion as well XD  
><strong>


	3. Day 3

After getting my little 'reward' from daddy Hidan, I was in need of a bath according to him. He started filling up the tub all giddy, "My little girl's all dirty now so she needs to be all cleaned up." Doesn't he see the irony; he's the one that got me dirty in the first place.

"Hidan?" Sasori came in carrying a brooding Deidara, "Are you giving her a bath?" "Yeah why?" "Well, Deidei needs one too but I'll wait until you're done." I tugged on Hidan's pants, "That's not a good idea." "Why's that baby?"

"Um, if we have separate baths it'll make the hot water bill go up and Kakuzu won't like it." Hidan scowled, "I forgot about that. That miser would kill us if he came back to see that." Sasori took that opportunity to sit Deidara next to me, "I have to agree and personally, I don't want to hear his bickering."

"Agreed, I'll go tell Zetsu." "Come on Deidei, time for your bath." Sasori took Deidara's clothes off and ended up stripping me of mine as well. There we were in tub when Tobi soon came in to join us. "Ok, now let's get to work."

Trust me, all three of us tried to sweet talk our way to do it ourselves but….it didn't work. Our 'parents' bathed us and once we were dried off, we were in for another surprise. They took us into the living room again, naked, and placed on our stomachs.

"What are you doing Danna un?" Sasori poured something into his hands and started to rub in onto Deidara's back. "It's just lotion Deidei." Hidan gave me the same treatment, but he stared with my behind, "My girl isn't having dry skin while I'm around. It's going to be soft and supple."

I couldn't help but giggle at Tobi, for some reason he kept wriggling all over the place. "Please be still Tobi." "But it tickles!" **"I'll tickle you more after I'm done." **Once we were pampered they fumbled through the clothes.

"Ah, here we go….TOBI?" Tobi took off streaking and Zetsu had to chase him down. **"Get back here! You'll catch a cold if you don't put some clothes on!" **Deidara got my attention, "He saw the next outfit un." I didn't see it, but I saw mine and from the look on Deidara's face, he saw his too.

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><p>Somehow we went from baby outfits to sexy ones! I was now wearing a lavender, see-through, baby doll dress for women that came with matching, frilly panties. Deidara was in themed boxers attached with suspenders and a sailor's hat; yes, it was a naughty sailor outfit.<p>

Zetsu finally came back with Tobi, who was now wearing his. He was a little cowboy; with only the themed boxers and a bandana around his neck. What will they think of next? Tobi wasn't happy about his at all! "Not fair!" **"What's not fair?"**

"How come sempai gets to be the sailor and not Tobi?" Deidara and I burst out laughing. "It's not funny!" "Like hel….helmet it's not!" Hidan cocked an eyebrow but didn't whip me. I about forgot not to curse...I'm learning.

Aside from that, Deidara didn't seem too upset with his and I was content with mine too. Better than looking like a baby or having a bow in your hair. Tobi kept right on complaining about it until Zetsu got really aggravated. Sasori was getting annoyed too, "Give him a pacifier to shut him up Zetsu!"

Zetsu was already sitting in his chair, had pulled Tobi closer, and then…..wow. He whipped out his cock and stuck it in Tobi's mouth, **"Suck your pacy and be quiet." **Deidara and I instantly shut up and our jaws dropped open in shock. What kind of version of a pacifier is that?

"Well, that seemed to do the trick." Zetsu ran his fingers through Tobi's hair and looked VERY happy. Hidan tossed a pillow at me, "Stop staring." I made a face and hit him back with the pillow. "Oh, my little girl wants to play now?" "No." I wasn't sure what he meant by that so I better play it safe.

He crawled on the floor with me, "I'll wipe that sulky look off that cute little face." He tackled me and started tickling me. "Aggghhhh, stop it!" I was extremely ticklish and got him, he's ticklish too. I dragged Deidara into it and next thing you know, Sasori joined in. He tickled us but we couldn't do it to him; he wasn't ticklish at all.

We filled the room with laughter, squeals, and next thing you know all of us were totally out of breath. I don't know when, but Tobi popped into the fun at some point; obviously after his pacy exploded into his mouth.

That was fun, it's been a while since a tickle fight with more than two people. "Okay that's enough playtime, it's time for bed." We weren't tired but went along of course; only three days to go.

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><p><span>DAY 3<span>

Naturally, we went through the normal routine, but with a slight twist. We ate first then had to drink our milk through the bottle, after that the playpen so they could do whatever stuff they had to do. Today's agenda was: get the candy. We wanted some candy but they wouldn't let us have any.

"Tobi wants his candy sempai!" Tobi had a hidden stash in his room and wanted it BAD! Deidara had no choice but to take an unwanted action from Tobi's demand. "You guys owe me for this un."

The 'parents' were in the kitchen and we watched in anticipation. "Danna!" No answer. "DANNA!" Sasori came rushing in, "What's the matter Deidei?" He put on an adorable pout and asked, "May I go to the bathroom and wash my hands Danna. My hands are all dirty un." He showed his hands to prove it.

We smeared the crayons all over them. "Awww, you're so cute Deidei. Of course you can." As Sasori picked him up Tobi had to mock him, "Sempai so adorable." Deidara shot him a nasty look and bit his lip from saying anything. "I hope this goes well."

* * *

><p><span>Other POV<span>

Sasori actually let Deidara wash his hands on his own by giving him the puppy dog eyes; works every time. "Danna, didn't you have to tell Hidan something important today un?" Sasori knitted his eyebrows, "I don't believe so why?"

Deidara took his precious time on his hands until he could get him to leave. "You said something last night about a full proof plan to keep us out of trouble un?" Deidara wasn't making this up and didn't have a clue what Sasori was talking about before, but now he's using it at an advantage.

"Oh that's right. Stay right here Deidei whilst I go tell him before I forget." "Yes Danna un." As soon as he left, Deidara quickly ran into the bedroom and grabbed the candy from where Tobi told him.

He just came back and chunked it at the playpen. The only problem is that Sasori was standing right behind him; it's like he expected it. Tobi and Olivia caught the candy but kept staring at Sasori's frown; Deidara's in trouble. "I thought I told you to stay put?"

Deidara mentally hit himself for not sensing his presence and muttered, "I'm sorry Danna un." "That's not good enough this time." He dragged him into their bedroom and practically tore his clothes off. "Bad boys deserve to be punished, wouldn't you agree brat?"

The blonde meekly nodded his head and feared for the worst. Sasori tapped his chin and mumbled, "Hmm, I've already used the paddle on you so what should I do?" It took only a few minutes before his eyes lit up with an idea, "I have the perfect solution."

He took his own clothes off and sat down, "Alright Deidei, you have to show your Danna that you're really sorry. Make me forgive you." Deidara knew what Sasori wanted but he wasn't upset about it, he was thrilled. It's been a while since they've had sex, however, he's supposed to be unhappy about it; he can play the part.

He went to his knees and timidly grabbed Sasori's length and gently moved his hand up and down. He stared questionably at his Danna with a frown, who just nodded in approval and then he quickened the pace.

Delicately he met his lips with the head and gently suckled on it before taking his cock into his mouth, to bob at a nice steady pace. Sasori hissed from the sudden action, pushing down harder on Deidara's head.

Taking the initiative, he sucked harder, moving in sync with the thrusts of his Danna's hips. Sasori moaned loudly; Deidara knew how to please his lover. Sasori quickly pushed him away and bent him over his lap.

"What are you doing Danna un?" "I changed my mind. I want to punish you instead." Placing a hand on his lower back he warned, "Don't make a sound or you'll regret it Deidei." The blonde shivered, thinking he was going to be spanked again but he was wrong. Without warning, Sasori shoved an un-lubricated finger inside him instead.

* * *

><p>Deidara gasped and wriggled from the pain, "Oww, don't stick it in like that it hurts un!" Without moving his finger, Sasori asked with an evil grin, "Was that a noise I just heard?" Deidara's cursed under his breath. Quickly, Sasori shoved two more fingers inside him and began to roughly thrust and scissor the digits inside him.<p>

Deidara cried out from the pain, "Ahh! Stop it un!" He struggled against his grip, but couldn't get free.

After a few minutes of fingering, the pain started to subside of course and the blonde grew aroused. Liking the response he was getting, Sasori shoved his fingers in deeper until his Deidei moaned extremely loud.

He stopped and pulled them out, earning a whimper from his little blonde. He smirked at seeing his brat's erection, "My Deidei seems to be very excited about his Danna's punishment for some reason. What should I do about that?"

Deidara merely gave him a cute pout and was mentally begging for release of any kind. Sasori straddled him and whispered seductively in his ear, "Is my Deidei thirsty?" Confused, but he answered, "A little un." "Hmmm, good. Danna is going to give his Deidei his special milk if he's really sorry for being bad."

Deidara eagerly nodded, "Yes, I'm really sorry un." He planted a quick kiss on his lips before ramming himself inside his already prepared ass.

Deidara cried out and grabbed the sheets beneath him as Sasori slid partway out, only to thrust in again. He soon built up a rhythm, thrusting into him hard and fast, hitting his sweet spot each time.

The blonde tossed his head side to side, his body completely at the mercy of his Danna. Sasori stopped for a moment to slide his hands under Deidara and pull him upwards into a sitting position before resuming his thrusting.

Deidara's hands released the sheets and now clung to his partner, nails digging into the puppet master's back. "I want it Danna un"! "Does my Deidei want his Danna's milk?" "Yes, yes please, I want my Danna's milk un!"

He pounded into him faster, "Where do you want it?" Deidara was completely at Sasori's mercy, "Inside me, put your milk inside me un!" He felt himself getting tighter and hotter until, "DANNAAAA!" he came all over their stomachs and that set off Sasori, and he emptied his 'milk' deep inside his quivering brat.

Both panting they both flopped backwards onto the bed, "Is my Deidei all full now?" The blonde just nodded and pulled his lover closer.

* * *

><p><span>Other room<span>

We heard the noise Deidara and Sasori were making from in here; they were so loud. Sounds like a good punishment to me though.

At any rate, Tobi and I were sulking since Hidan took our candy away and we were punished for being sneaky. We were taken out of the pen and given the pacifiers to occupy us since we were so bored according to them, for what reason I don't know.

Hidan pushed my head down further and was moaning in content, as was Zetsu. "I'm about to cum!" A few more bobs and he released, leaving me no choice but to swallow it. He pulled me onto his lap and grinned, "Did my girl enjoy drinking her special milk?" Milk is it now?

I just grinned and rested my head on his shoulder; swallowing cum isn't exactly something I enjoy. "Tobi want more!" "You've already had two helpings today Tobi, that's enough."

"That's what you get for spoiling him Zetsu." **"Shut up Hidan."**

This day went rather well I guess, though tomorrow is another story.

**To be continued: (Review chapter too, not just answering question. Do both lol)**

**Next question for readers: Who do you think is the hottest Akatsuki member?**

**Or…..like I said before, the readers can ask a question to the akatsuki/author instead ^-^**


	4. Day 4

Day 4

Today was NOT going well for me. I had a pounding headache and trying to get some medicine for it but a certain Jashinist wouldn't let me!

I was lying in bed, clutching my aching head with a pestering Hidan trying to get me up. "It's time to get up baby, stop playing opossum." I tried to sit up, "Hidan my head hurts so please stop shaking me."

He pushed me back down, "If your head hurts, then you need to stay in bed baby." "Then could you please get me some medicine for it?" "No sweetie, you might choke on the pills if you take them. The headache will go away once you get some more rest."

He's ticking me off at the worst time imaginable and making me lose control of my temper; knowing that if I do I'll be in trouble. "Hidan! You know very good and well that when I get a headache like this it does NOT go away on its own, so please let me get some medicine."

"Don't get an attitude with me young lady, that answer is no. Just go back to sleep." Strike three. I shot straight out of bed and pushed him with all my might to leave. I advanced out the bedroom door with my head about to split open since I was moving about; it gets worse when I do that but I had no choice.

He angrily grabbed me by the wrist, "What did I just tell you?" "Let go of me!" "No, you're going back to bed!" "I SAID LET GO!" He started dragging me back to my bed and I had no choice….I charley horsed his leg with my foot. It actually worked too. (I was contemplating about kicking him in the crotch but….that would be a death sentence).

He just let go of my wrist with a grunt when I ran like hell to the bathroom and locked the door. I found the pills and took them as I tried to ignore Hidan banging on the door.

I was already swimmy headed at this point and slowly curled up on the floor. The coolness of te tiles felt nice against my flustered skin, damn, I feel like I'm going to be sick now. "THAT'S IT!" Hidan managed to unlock the door and was beyond a doubt livid.

I had my eyes closed but I knew he was when he yelled. I barely opened my eyes when he scooped me up and marched into the living room. He plopped me onto the couch and growled, "If you even budge from this spot until I fucking get back, you're going to get the punishment of a lifetime. Do you understand?"

Despite my headache I couldn't myself, "Oooooh, you said a curse word! I'm telling~" He pursed his lips, "Pfft," and left to go into the kitchen. That was too funny. "Hey Olivia un?" "Hmm?" Deidara came over and gave me a fixed look, "You just had to do that didn't you un?" "Yep."

He narrowed his eyes at me and felt my forehead, "You're burning up, are you ok un?" I meekly nodded, "Very bad headache." "Is that why Hidan was mad at Olivee?" Tobi appeared next to Deidara, "Sort of. I woke up with this damn headache and Hidan wouldn't let me take any medicine for it, so I charley horsed his leg and locked myself into the bathroom."

"Poor Olivee, did you get the medicine?" "Thankfully yes, so I should start to feel better soon. By the way, how come you two aren't in the pen?" Deidara shrugged, "There was really no need to since we're about to get breakfast, just as long as we don't misbehave un."

"We have to be good boys!" I smirked a little and closed my eyes again, "You do know that Hidan will get you back right un?" "Unfortunately yes."

* * *

><p><span>Kitchen POV<span>

Sasori and Zetsu were making breakfast with Hidan bickering up a storm. "I don't understand that girl sometimes. One minute she's a little angel then the next, ultimate spitfire. She even curses to boot! It's like she has mood swings all the time like Kakuzu….that has to be where she gets it from!"

Zetsu had to smirk, **"That's probably true, as for the cursing…where do you think she heard those words?" **Hidan shrugged, "I don't know! She told me that she heard them from me, but that's absurd. I've never cursed like a sailor in my life! I just let a few slip out every now and then."

Zetsu chuckled, "Don't worry about it so much Hidan, little girls are usually like that. They tend to find out things they're curious about whether we want them to or not." Sasori put the food on the table and brought out the bottles, "He does have a point Hidan. If you ask me, girls are more temperamental than boys."

Hidan frowned, "I guess, but it makes me feel like I'm not doing a good job as a parent. I've been good to her and yet she STILL gives me an attitude." Sasori gave his friend a sympathetic smile and handed him a small packet, "Here, put this in her bottle."

"Is this that drug you were talking about yesterday?" "Yes, once she takes that into her system she'll be nothing but an extremely good girl to make her daddy happy." Hidan smirked and poured it into the bottle and mixed it.

* * *

><p><span>My POV<span>

My headache was fairly better when they came to get us, so that was good. Hidan didn't seem mad at all anymore and that got me wondering. He doesn't cool off that quick, so something's up…but what?

After breakfast, it was bottle time as usual. I really didn't want any but what choice did I have. As I was drinking, I noticed my headache was gone completely and I was getting groggy. Why am I so tired all of a sudden?

I peeked open my eyes and everything was blurry, this isn't normal..…..

* * *

><p><span>Other POV<span>

Hidan grinned happily when she was finished and took the bottle away. "Is my little girl all full now?" She nodded as he carried her over to the playpen. He tried to put her in it but she whined and latched onto his neck, "Don't you want to play in the pen?" "No~"

Hidan attempted again but got the same reaction, "No! Want to stay with daddy!" Deidara and Tobi's shot her a look of confusion as they were just put into the pen. "Daddy will be right back. Be a good girl and play with Deidei and Tobi ok."

She pulled back with a pout but let him sit her in the pen. When the 'parents' left, Deidara and Tobi attempted to find out what was going on with her. "Olivee, are you feeling ok?" "Yeah." Deidara was skeptical, "Why did you want to stay with Hidan? Was that an act to keep from being put in here un?"

She shook her head smiling, "Nope, wanted to be with daddy. Olivee love her daddy." Their mouths dropped and Tobi asked, "Olivee, who are your lovers?"

She tilted her head questionably, "Lovers? What Tobi mean?" Tobi grasped Deidara's arm, "Sempai?" Deidara was just as confused and curiously handed her a stuffed animal that she happily took and started playing with it.

"What the hell is going on un?" "Did Olivee snap sempai?" "No I don't think that's the case. I have a sneaking suspicion that she's been drugged un." He glanced around and saw that Hidan dropped the bottle in the pen when he put her in it.

He picked it up, opened, and sniffed it. "I smell herbs, thought as much un." "Olivee drugged sempai?" "Yes and we're definitely going to have to be 'good boys' even more thoroughly than before or we'll end up like her un."

*They all amused themselves for a good while and Tobi was having a ball with her. "Will you stop that un!" Tobi had her on his lap, gently tickling her just to make her laugh with a big dopey grin on his face, "Why sempai?"

"It's just weird un." "No, sempai just jealous that Olivee wants to be with Tobi and not him." "Shut up Tobi, that's not true un!" Tobi was about to make a witty comeback but Olivee distracted him.

She kissed him on the cheek and then went over to play with the building blocks. "Awww, did you see that Sempai? Olivee kissed Tobi!" "I'm not blind you idiot un!" Tobi threw a stuffed animal at him and next thing you know, stuffed animal fight slight wrestling match.

Unlucky for Deidara, he accidently knocked over the blocks she stacked up. They didn't notice her as she stared pitifully at the blocks. She was quietly sniffling about her blocks and threw one at Deidara, thus hitting him in the head.

That made him and Tobi stop, "What'd you do that for un?" She pointed at the blocks that were toppled over and choking back a sob. "No! Don't you dare cry un!" He hurriedly grabbed the blocks and tried to fix it, but that didn't work. "I'm sorry un."

"You did it on purpose." Deidara didn't know what to do and threw his hands up in aggravation but, he ended up smacking her cheek….that did it. "Sempai!" She clutched her cheek and began to quietly sob and hiccup, with the tears flowing down.

* * *

><p>"Shit, shit, shit! Don't cry I said un!" She gradually got louder despite them trying to calm her down, but to no avail. "Daddy! I want my daddy!" "What's going on in here?" Hidan came marching in from the hallway with Sasori right on his heels.<p>

Tobi glanced over at Deidara, "You're going to get it sempai." "Don't I know it un? All they could do was watch and wait to see what would happen. "Daddy!" She was reaching out for him when he scooped her up furious, "Why is she crying?"

Hidan was glaring daggers at the other two, figuring they were the cause. "Well um…." She looked at Hidan and pointed to her cheek, for him to see a big red mark. "Who hit you?" She whimpered, "Deidei."

Sasori and Hidan both gave him a menacing glare, "Is this true brat?" Deidara meekly nodded his head, "It was an accident Danna un." "It's true, Tobi saw the whole thing." "You're going to get it boy for hitting my little girl like that!"

Sasori smirked and asked, "I have an idea Hidan." "What is it?" "Since my boy hit your girl, I think it's only fair that you punish him instead of myself. Wouldn't you agree?" Hidan grinned evilly and Deidara gulped, "I think that's an excellent idea Sasori."

He handed her over to Sasori and hurled Deidara onto his shoulder. Sasori sat coddling her on the couch as Hidan carried Deidara into his room. He pinned the blonde against the wall, jerking down his shorts after he grabbed a belt, "I'll teach you not to hit others Deidara!"

"No Hidan un!" He brought the belt down on his behind hard enough to hear a snap against the tender skin. He whipped him many times, making him beg and crying for the jashinist to stop. He finally stopped after that behind had nice big red whelps covering the entire rump.

He roughly jerked his shorts up, and turned him around so he could see the tear stained face of the blonde. "Will you hit anyone again boy?" "N..No un." "What do you say?" I..I…I'm…sorry un."

Figuring that was good enough, he took him back to the other room and gave him to Sasori after he got his girl back. Hidan happily started kissing and tickling her to make her squeal cutely when Sasori handed Deidara a sippy cup.

"Here's your juice, so drink up Deidei." Deidara didn't and made Sasori angry. "I said drink brat." "Please no Danna un." He knew it was drugged but Sasori forced him to, he held the tip in his mouth and squeezed the cup so the liquid shot out.

Deidara struggled as best as he could, but he involuntarily swallowed and it took its course. He gradually stopped resisting and ended up just like her. "Does my Deidei feel all better now?" The blonde happily nodded and snuggled up to his Danna.

Poor Tobi watched as they were soon brought back into the pen with him again so the 'parents' could go fix dinner. "Sempai?" "Sempai? Tobi knows my name is Deidei un." "NO!" Tobi grabbed his shoulders and started to shake him, "Don't leave Tobi all alone sempai!"

"Tobi, you making Deidei dizzy!" Olivee hugged him and handed him a teddy bear as Tobi mentally freaked out and hugged his knees along with the bear,

"Tobi the only sane one left!"

**To be continued: Next time….the other's come home YAY!**

**Next question: Ahem….not asking one LOL. You smut loving readers can ask the Akatsuki/author something ^-^**


	5. Day 5

**By the by, you readers let me know what you think of my new avatar 'akatsuki easter' that I drew and let me know what you think when it shows up ^-^ (tobi's basket of eggs gone but not my fault, fanfic only allow so much space)  
><strong>

DAY 5

Tobi's POV

All three of us were back in our outfits from day one. _Today's the last day and the others will be coming back. Tobi can't take much more!_ Tobi was trying to be a good boy and not do anything bad so he won't get drugged like they were._ If that happened, the others won't know what's going on so it's up to Tobi._

From Zetsu's lap he watched Olivee and his sempai play with the new stuffed animals they got. Tobi found it funny that sempai was inseparable with the little lamb.

"**Tobi?"** "Hmm?" "What's the matter?" By now, Tobi knew how to get what he wanted from Zetsu and pouted, "Tobi want to play with Olivee and Deidei."

Zetsu smiled and ruffled his hair, **"Alright, you've been a good boy." **He was placed into the pen and out of sheer boredom, starting tickling his sempai. _Tobi hardly ever gets him in a tickle fight and its fun when sempai not yelling at him to stop._

He barely managed to survive the morning, mostly because he made his sempai cry by accidentally pulling his hair during the tickle fight. He managed to make him stop in time by giving him his lamb and kissing him all over the face; that cheered him up so he didn't get punished _or_ caught.

* * *

><p><span>Other POV<span>

When noon came the others FINALLY came back and Tobi was anxious to see their reactions. The door opened and Kakuzu barely took two steps into the room, followed by Kisame and Itachi, when they stopped dead in their tracks with widened eyes.

Hidan was bouncing Olivia up and down on his knee with her giggling up a storm, "Bounce me higher daddy!" Sasori was rocking Deidara, who was clutching a stuffed animal, and looked like he was trying to get him to go to sleep. A pitiful Tobi was sitting in a playpen hugging his knees. As for Zetsu…he was….knitting.

"Welcome home Kakuzu! It's about time you got here, I've missed you!" Kakuzu's eye twitched from the odd greeting that did NOT sound like the jashinist at all.

Hidan came over and handed Olivia over to him, along with a bottle. There he was, an S-ranked criminal, holding an infant-like lover in one hand and an actual baby bottle in the other.

Hidan gave him a chaste kiss on the cheek, "Make sure she drinks the rest of her milk and don't get her riled up. Daddy Hidan needs some 'me' time right now so I'm taking a long soak in the tub."

"What the hell is going on Hidan?" "Shhhhh, don't curse in front of her! I just finally got her to stop." Kisame choked back a chuckle, along with Itachi who seemed very intrigued also. "Hidan, answer my damn question."

Hidan punched him in the shoulder and snapped, "I knew it! You're the reason how she learned those curse words. I'm trying to raise her right and you went behind my back and did it anyway! How could you do that to me?"

Kakuzu growled, "She's not our child Hidan, she's our _lover_ you moron! Why are you acting like some overly protective parent?" Hidan put his hands on his hips and scowled, "I wish I knew why you keep insulting me all the time like this, but suit yourself. Don't come crying to me later for sex because you're NOT GETTING ANY AT ALL!"

Hidan stomped off on the verge of tears as Sasori glared at Kakuzu, "I hope you're happy now Kakuzu, you probably just ruined your relationship with Hidan." That hit a nerve for the miser and he quickly handed her over to Kisame to go check on Hidan.

"Itachi?" "Yes, Tobi?" "Will you take Tobi out of the playpen please?" Kisame cocked an eyebrow and mused, "You got legs Tobi, just step over it." Itachi shook his head, "No he can't Kisame, there's a barrier around it." "Well, that's clever I'll give them that."

Itachi got Tobi out and asked quietly, "What's going on Tobi? You're the only one who seems in their right state of mind." "Tobi tell Itachi what he knows but he needs Zetsu's permission or Tobi get in trouble." "I see. Zetsu?"

He paused with his knitting, "Yes?" "May I talk with Tobi for a few minutes?" **"What for?"** He easily told him a white lie, "I want an idea of what kind of games he likes so I can get him some for being a good boy." "Oh is that all? Go ahead, but don't confuse my Tobi." "I wouldn't dream of it Zetsu, come along Tobi."

Itachi carried him into the kitchen to discuss the circumstances. Sasori grinned, "Itachi's real good with kids. You should consider having some with him Kisame." Said man just smirked and followed his lover into the kitchen.

* * *

><p><span>Kitchen<span>

Tobi was already babbling as fast as he could go when Kisame plopped down in a chair. Itachi listened intently to every word he said, easily keeping up with the rambling. "So, something went wrong with that experimental jutsu they were doing that day and…" Chuckle.

Itachi sighed, "That would explain why they're so out of character. What strikes me odd…." Louder chuckling. He pursed his lips, "WHAT strikes me odd is that they…." Chuckling turns into laughter. "Kisame! Will you stop that please?"

Kisame was grinning from ear to ear, "I'm sorry Itachi, but she's cute." "That's why you're laughing so much and distracting me?" Tobi starting giggling and made Itachi look to see what was so amusing.

She had Kisame's free hand clutched by both of hers and suckling on the tip of his middle finger. "I have to admit, that is rather cute." Kisame smirked, "This is why I was laughing, watch what she does."

He jerked his finger away and she quickly snatched it back, latching on to it for dear life so his hand wouldn't get away again. It was obvious that she started sucking harder but what was really funny is that she was glaring at Kisame now; daring him to try it again.

"Don't give me that look or Uncle Kisame is going to spank you." Her scowl softened and affectionately nuzzled against his chest to show she didn't want that. Itachi face palmed, "Don't encourage her Kisame." "What? I just want to have some fun; it's not every day this happens."

"Olivee so adorable! Tobi want to play with her now." Itachi pulled him back down and gave him a fixed look before changing the subject, "As I was saying, what I find odd is that they went maternal from this jutsu." "What do we do about it Itachi?"

"For once, those camera's of Sasori's are going to come into use this time. I can find out that way to see what went wrong but the question is, does he have them in Zetsu's apartment?" Tobi shrugged, "Tobi has no idea so we do?"

"I'll go have a word with him and convince him to give me access to it if he does. In the meantime, make sure Olivia and Deidara doesn't get any more of that drug so it can wear off." "Alright." "Tobi got it!"

* * *

><p><span>Bedroom<span>

The miser barely managed to get the zealot to forgive him but when he did….makeup sex was in order. Plus, he has been away from his lovers for almost a week so he was fairly amorous. "Ooooh, right there Kakuzu!"

He hit his prostate with ease as he thrust into him at a moderate pace, even though he really wanted to pound into him hard and fast. Even in the bedroom, Hidan's usual actions were MUCH different because of this jutsu. When Kakuzu got too rough, he started whimpering for him to stop; he wanted passionate love making.

It's not that Kakuzu didn't mine passionate sex, he's just naturally aggressive by nature and Hidan provokes him to be hardcore and relentless. Kakuzu attacked his neck with tiny sucks and nips as Hidan wrapped his arms around his neck moaning like crazy.

_Well, he's still loud as shit. That much hasn't changed at all. _"Kuzuuuuu, more!" The miser happily pounded him slightly harder, trying to control himself of course, "AHHHHHH, I'm gonna….gonna…"

Hidan attacked his lover's mouth with a searing, tongue fest when he came groaning into the other's mouth. _He came so damn quickly! _He kept thrusting into him as Hidan became a panting lump below him and soon began to whimper. "Kakuzu…stop…hurts."

Thankfully that whimpering brought him closer to the edge and growled into Hidan's neck, "I'm almost there." "Please….please….Kuzuuuuu!" That clinched it as he pound one extra hard time before cumming inside his lover with a low groan.

BAM! BAM! "Hey Hidan! Olivia's pitching a fit what do I do to get her to be quiet?" Kakuzu scowled as Hidan rolled his eyes and shouted, "Give her a pacifier!" "And where the hell is it?" "It's in your pants you idiot!"

The only response he got was: whoever it was on the other side of the door, walked away laughing, "OK!"

**To be continued:**

**Making this chappie a two part so more to come **

**p.s. not going to post review questions/responses until after next chapter is up and get reviews on this and the next one mwhahahaha. **

**Some naughty readers not reviewing the story and only the questions, NOT nice.**


	6. Day 5 part 2

Other POV

Itachi easily got access to the videotape and currently was sitting in Sasori's room carefully observing it. Thankfully, Sasori did set up some at Zetsu's apartment; he wished he knew why though_. In this apartment, lots of homemade porn's here to be sure but at Zetsu's? There'd be no telling I guess; maybe that's why he installed them. _

Within five minutes he noticed something on the screen and rewound it to make sure; he figured it out instantly. _Those fools didn't notice what kind of jutsu this was!__? _He just stopped the tape when Kisame ran by carrying a whining Olivia with a huge grin on his face. _What's he up to?_

*Kisame thought it was hilarious that Hidan told him what to give her to shut up and he WASN'T going to complain. She kept right on whining and trying to get away as he whipped out his cock. "Open up Olivee, time for your pacifier." He just about had it in her mouth when, "Kisame!"

Itachi marched in and took her away from him, "HEY?" "What do you think you're doing?" "What Hidan told me to do, giving her the pacifier in my pants to get her to be quiet." "Are you serious?" "Yes, now give her back!" "I want to hear this for myself."

Itachi went, taking her with him, and knocked on Hidan's bedroom door, "Hidan?" "WHAT? I'M BUSY HERE!" Itachi heard some vocal moans and sighed, "Did you tell Kisame to give her the pacifier in his pants?" "YES!" Then he heard Kakuzu, "Now go away so we can finish Itachi!" "Alright."

_Kisame was telling the truth, interesting jutsu indeed. _"NO UN!" Itachi and Kisame went into the living room and saw Sasori trying to drag Deidara from the couch, "Put the toy back! You don't need it for a nap!" "LAMBY! GIVE ME MY LAMBY UN!"

Kisame smirked and offered his assistance, "Do you need any help Sasori." Sasori gave up with his brat and rubbed his temples, "Sadly I do, would you please get him to take a nap. My nerves are too shot to deal with him right now." "Sure thing."

With that Sasori left and Kisame picked up the fussy Deidara with the lamb in his other hand before taking him into the bedroom. "Give me my lamby un!" Kisame roughly sat the blonde on his lap and asked sweetly, "You want it back?"

A pouty nod was his response, "Uncle Kisame will give it to you, but only if Deidei calms down and takes his pacifier first." "Promise un?" "I promise." Deidara quickly got his pacy and happily started sucking on it, thus making Kisame VERY happy.

* * *

><p>*Itachi came in a moment later and smirked at Deidara giving Kisame head before she starting acting up again. "Put Olivee down!" She kept trying to kick him as she whined when he grinned. <em>Why not? The others can wait. <em>He went into his and Kisame's bathroom and sat in a chair before speaking to her firmly.

"Be a good girl for Uncle Itachi or no sweets for you later." "No sweets?" He pulled out his member and pointed, "No sweets, so suck your pacifier and behave." From that harsh tone she quickly popped it into her mouth and did what she was told.

He sighed with content and gripped the top of her head. She twirled her tongue along the slit and suckled so damn softly on the head. He partially closed his eyes and leaned his head back from the tender sucks and nibbles. He never expected to get so aroused from such soft sensations from her.

He let out a low moan when she bobbed lower and tried not to buck his hips up. He was losing his control and wanted to make it last longer but it was getting difficult. After five minutes he couldn't take it anymore; he pushed her head down lower, making her whimper a little, and bucked his hips up when he came.

He trembled in ecstasy, running his fingers through her hair when she pulled away with a frown. Itahci noticed she hadn't swallowed and gave her the trashcan, "You don't have to swallow if you don't want to." She snatched it from him and spat it all out, she definitely did not want to.

"Can Olivee have candy now?" Itachi thoughtfully tapped a finger against his chin, _I shouldn't but I can't resist. _He gently stroked her cheek, "Not quite yet, we need to play first alright." "Fine."

He pushed her on her back and straddled her, "Don't be like that, this'll be fun." She just pouted as he deftly stripped his clothes off. He only took off her boy shorts and left the pink nightie top on; it looked too cute on her.

Itachi was already hard, easily got her aroused and just entered her when, "UNCLE KISAME UN!" Itachi's head popped up in surprise from Deidara's sudden scream and chuckled. _Kisame couldn't restrain himself I see, though I have no room to talk at the moment. _He didn't stop his thrusts and focused back on pleasuring his little 'niece.'

"Uncle…It…tachi~." He smirked from the soft whimpers she was making and thrust faster before hearing another yell. "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING TO MY DEIDEI?" _He got caught so I better wrap this up before Hidan comes after me. _He kissed her deeply and it's a good thing he did, when she came with an extremely vocal moan.

He thrust a few more times before he too came with a controlled low moan before pulling out. BAM! BAM! "YOU BETTER OPEN UP THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW ITACHI! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!" _Hidan's not happy! _ He hastily cleaned/dressed himself and her, then picking her up and opening the door to a scowling Hidan.

* * *

><p>"What were you doing with my little girl in there?" "She needed to go to the bathroom obviously, isn't that right Olivee?" She weakly nodded and nuzzled against his neck when Hidan took her. "Just checking since your lover violated poor Deidei. I thought you were doing the same to my girl."<p>

"Don't fret about it Hidan, it's perfectly understandable. So where it Kisa…" He was quickly answered when Kisame shot out of the room laughing with Sasori right on his heels with a puppet. Hidan chuckled, "Serves him right." "Where Danna un?"

A very ruffled Deidara was in the doorway holding his lamb and rubbing his eyes. "Danna went to punish Uncle Kisame so go lie back down Deidei." He yawned, "Deidei want Olivee to take nap with him un." Hidan smirked and carried her in there, "Ok, but I don't want to hear a peep out of you two." "Ok un." "Olivee be good girl."

Hidan and Itachi tucked them into bed and were just about to leave when, "Daddy, Olivee want kiss." Hidan happily did, "Deidei want one too un." "Ok you too." He kissed him when Hidan heard a snort from the doorway, "That is disturbing on so many levels."

"Be quiet Kakuzu, it wouldn't kill you to be affectionate too you know." Before Kakuzu could reply Itachi signaled him to be quiet and follow him.

They went into the living room, where Zetsu was happily still knitting with Tobi asleep on his lap this time. Itachi dragged Kakuzu into the kitchen and sat at the table, "What have you found out Itachi?"

"They're fools." Kakuzu scowled, "I knew that much, but what kind of jutsu is it?" "It's quite amusing actually." "Well?" "It's a prank jutsu." "You've got to be kidding me?" "No I'm not, as to where they obtained it I don't know, but at least it's a simple fix. We only need to release it like you would a genjutsu."

"Then let's hurry up and do it. I can't take much more of a motherly Hidan!" Itachi choked back a chuckle and went to get Zetsu first, who just finished his work. "What do you think Itachi?" **"Will this look good on Tobi?"**

Itachi observed the pale orange, scarf and nodded, "You've done exceedingly well Zetsu, it's lovely. It suites Tobi perfectly." Zetsu smiled and just put it down when Itachi deactivated the jutsu, "Release."

Zetsu blinked a few times and stared around the room, "What's going on?" **"What the hell happened to this room?" **Tobi woke up and stared at his lover, "Zetsu?" "Tobi, why are you wearing that? It's cute but, I don't approve of that in public." **"It's supposed to be for my eyes only."**

Tobi gasped and stared at Itachi, "Yes, he's back to normal." "ZETSU!" He tackled his lover in a hug, "Itachi, what did I miss?" "You'll find out everything in a while."

* * *

><p>*Hidan was backed into a corner and eyeing Kakuzu with caution, "The answer is no Kakuzu. We've already had sex, twice!" "It's time for you to be your usual annoying self again." "What are yo…." "Release."<p>

Hidan stood motionless for a minute before glaring at his lover, "What the fuck did you do to me old man?" "That's my idiot!" The miser attacked him a hug before dragging his, once again, cursing lover into the living room.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" Hidan's mouth dropped at the nursery of a living room that was in front of him, "It's a fucking kitty play ground! Who's fucking responsible for this?" Tobi laughed, "You, Zetsu, and Sasori." "Like fuck it is!" Kakuzu covered his mouth, "It's true but you'll find out once Itachi gets Sasori fixed."

Hidan pried his hand from his mouth, "Fixed? You mean like a neutered mutt?" "Just shut up before I regret fixing you." "I'm NOT fucking fixed! I can make babies!" Zetsu and Tobi were cracking up and it got worse when Kisame came running back in, still being chased by Sasori.

Before Sasori left again, Kakuzu used his threads to stop him dead in his tracks. "Let me go so I can kill that poor excuse of a fish!" "What the fuck did Kisame do that was so bad?" "He DEFILED my Deidei! You were there!"

Hidan sat down, "Deidei? Did I fucking miss something." "Release." "It's about time Itachi." "He was faster than I gave him credit for." Once Sasori was better his mouth dropped from seeing the living room, "Do I even want to know why this room is filled with toys and a playpen?"

"I'd like to know what happened to us?" "After we were drugged un." Deidara and Olivia were in the hall doorway just as confused. "Sasori, it's time to watch a movie. Go get the tapes; we're having a marathon to see what we missed."

* * *

><p>*Tape 1:<p>

"Nice bow Deidei!" "SHUT UP KISAME UN!" Sasori shook his head, "Truly pitiful how we turned out to be because of a ridiculous prank jutsu!" **"It's your own fault for not noticing it Sasori."** The puppetmaster growled, "Why didn't you notice it then Zetsu?"

Kisame turned up the volume, "Stop bickering and let's finish this already!"

*Tape 2:

Kakuzu and Kisame howled with laughter that they resorted to baby bottles and then Hidan getting smacked by me. "Damn, you three are strict parents. How many times have you whipped them so far?" Zetsu wrapped an arm around his lover, "I'm sorry I did that to you Tobi." "It's ok Zetsu, Tobi knows it not your fault."

Itachi grinned, "Still got to give them credit on the playpen barrier." _Does my Tobi want to feel good?_ Our eyes grew wide from Zetsu jerked off Tobi in the bathroom. Kisame mocked, "How could you violate your little boy like that?" "Shut up!"

Sasori grinned at the next scene with her and Deidara fighting over the clay, "Now that's my brat for you; he does not share." "Danna un!" Kakuzu cracked up on the cursing lecture, "Like you have room to talk on that Hidan."

Hidan rolled his eyes and mumbled under his breath. _"Daddy going to make his girl feel REAL good now." _I tried to leave the room when this showed up but I was dragged back down to keep watching. "That was hot."

Hidan grinned evilly and leered at me, "Hidan. don't you dare say it!" That grin got wider, "Who's you're daddy!" Facepalm on my part. Sasori smirked, "Apparently Hidan is."

Zetsu chuckled loudly, "I didn't know my Tobi was a streaker." "WOAH!" Attention turned back to the screen, "How did you guys go from baby clothes to naughty outfits?" "Beats me." "Wish I could've been there for that."

"_Suck your pacy and be quiet."_ Everyone stared at Zetsu who was trying not to blush, "What kind of fucking version of a pacifier is that?" **"Drop it."**

* * *

><p>*Tape 3:<p>

"_I thought I told you to stay put?" _Itachi cocked an eyebrow, "Busted." Deidara made a face but didn't say anything. _The blonde tossed his head side to side, his body completely at the mercy of his Danna. _Sasori was getting quite aroused from this scene and rubbing the inside of his lover's leg without thinking.

"We might need to have an intermission if Sasori keeps watching this." Sasori smirked and withdrew his hand before he was forced to leave with his brat. _"Did my girl enjoy drinking her special milk?"_ Hidan nibbled my earlobe and cooed, "Yes, did you fucking enjoy drinking my milk?" "No comment."

*Tape 4:

Hidan gasped at the screen and I tried not to laugh, "You think it's funny that you fucking hit me?" "Yes, yes I do since you wouldn't let me take the medicine!" _"Oooooh, you said a curse word! I'm telling~" _The others chuckled from the joke but Hidan just snorted since it was directed at him.

"I don't have mood swings Hidan!" Hidan smirked, "Keep fucking telling yourself that old man."_"I've never cursed like a sailor in my life!" _Everyone found that extremely funny, but mostly Kakuzu.

"_Here, put his in her bottle." _"Well, that explains why Deidara and Olivia were acting odd." "Yeah, cudos to Tobi for being an extra good boy so it wouldn't happen to him." _"Olivee love her daddy." _"Damn straight she fucking loves her daddy!"

I couldn't help but grin from that gloat. _"Shit, shit ,shit! Don't cry I said un!" _"Nice knowing you Deidara." "Look, I didn't mean to alright un!" "We know that, but tell that to Hidan on the TV." Deidara scowled and watched his punishment scene.

"Damn, kind of a rough punishment wouldn't you say?" Hidan just shrugged and smirked. _"Tobi the only sane one left!"_ Everyone howled with laughter, aside from Tobi, Zetsu, and Olivia. "Why everybody think that so funny?" "You being the only sane one left is like me not fucking cursing all the time. It's fucking wrong!"

Tobi hung his head and I smacked Hidan upside the head. "Ow! What the fuck was that for?" I just gave him a look and sat next to Tobi and hugged him. Zetsu was glaring menacingly like he was going to eat Hidan; that made him shut up instantly.

* * *

><p>*Tape 5:<p>

Deidara's eye twitched when he saw himself crying on the screen and glared at Tobi, "Tobi didn't mean to sempai!" "Shh, here's where we come in!" "Wait a minute, Zetsu! Since when can you knit?" **"How the hell am I supposed to know?"**

Tobi smiled and held up the scarf, "Tobi thinks Zetsu did great job and Tobi loves it!" "Your welcome though I doubt it'll happen again."

_Hidan put his hands on his hips and scowled. _"FUCK! I'm such a pussy!" "Yes you are Hidan, you've always been a whiny bitch." "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" _I had Kisame's free hand clutched by both of mine and suckling on his middle finger. _

I felt eyes on me and glanced over at Kisame; he gave me a wink and tried to look innocent. _"Oooh, right there Kakuzu!" _"MORE PORN!" Everyone stared at me as I tried to keep a straight face; didn't work out too great.

"_Give her a pacifier!" "And where the hell is it?" "It's in your pants you idiot!" _Hidan's mouth dropped, "What the fuck did I just say?" "You gave whoever it was on the other side of the door permission to get a blowjob from her." Hidan glared at Sasori then asked, "Why do I have a fucking feeling it was Kisame?"

The scene continued and sure enough it was. "THANK YOU~ ITACHI!" "For what?" "You stopped her from giving him head!" Itachi hid a smirk, knowing Hidan's bubble would soon burst. _Deidara quickly got his pacy and happily started sucking on it_.

Sasori narrowed his eyes at Kisame but his attention was caught by Kakuzu, "What the hell Itachi?" I watched myself give him head and then having sex. "Itachi!" I gapped at him and he innocently smiled back.

"_UNCLE KISAME UN!" Kisame thrust into a whimpering Deidara from behind hard and fast. _"Him too?" Deidara's eyes grew wide and glanced over at Kisame, "Really un?" "What? You didn't complain." Zetsu shook his head and pointed, "No, Sasori just did."The screen showed Sasori trying to kill Kisame when he ran out of the room laughing.

We finally finished watching all the footage and with a few more cracks about it, gathered all the kids stuff and put it away in the storage room (for future use of course).

All I can say is that NEVER….EVER again, will those three attempt an experimental jutsu for a long time yet to come if I have anything to say about it.

**Final chapter…well not quite lol.**

**I post the review chapter next, THEN the final chapter. I'm making ONE more for this and it's going to be HILARIOUS! ^-^**

**Here's the question/hint: On final chapter, I'm having Olivia drug one of the others with the baby drug and YOU smut loving readers are going to vote on WHO! **

**Who's going to be her little boy? XD  
><strong>

**(NOT Deidara or Tobi though; they've already suffered enough lol)**

**P.S. If I don't get reviews on this chapter content I'm NOT going to do anymore review chapters. LOA would like to know what the readers find funny as hell or sexy and what not XP**


	7. Olivee's Baby Boys

"Pretty please Sasori?" He pinched the bridge of his nose, "Fine!" He handed me the tiny packet and wouldn't let go until he gave me a warning, "Just do NOT use this on my brat. Understand?" I just grinned, "I'm not going to I promise."

He finally let it go and whispered in my ear before I left, "I do expect my payment by tonight." "I know! I know!" Sheesh! I hurried towards the kitchen to put my plan into action.

I want to have fun with that 'obedient baby drug' too. The question was: who's going to be my baby boy? I thought this out thoroughly and narrowed down my choices. Deidara and Tobi suffered enough, same for Hidan, Sasori and Zetsu. That leaves three.

Let's see, Itachi wouldn't fall for it. Kakuzu….uh….I want to, yet….what'll happen to me afterwards? Didn't like the thought and the same went for Kisame but, it HAS to be one of them two though.

I put a LOT of thought into it and decided: KISAME! Hate to say this but Kakuzu would freak me out acting like a toddler. Now, how to get my prey to take the drug?

*I walked into the kitchen and fortune was on my side. Kisame was sitting alone at the table reading the paper. "Hey Kisame." "Hey." I pretended to head for the fridge when he asked, "Can you get me glass of orange juice Olivia, since you're already there."

"Sure." This was TOO easy! I'm glad that I'd already opened up the packet before I came in here. I poured the powder and juice at the same time to avoid making a mistake (have no idea if it can be tasted if it wasn't stirred).

"Here you go." "Thanks." Damn, he chugged the whole glass until it was empty already, "AH, that hit the spot." Victory is mine! It wasn't even a minute when I noticed a change in his behavior. He did too and looked at the glass before glaring at me, "I'm going to kill…."

His expression went totally blank and didn't finish his sentence. I got worried from that reaction. Sasori did give me the right drug I hope. I went over and gently shook him, "Kisame?" "Hmm?" "Are you ok?"

A big grin creeped up on his face, "Kisame fine, why pretty lady ask?" Yep, that's the correct drug all right. This is going to be SO MUCH FUN!

* * *

><p>*Pretty lady! I pinched his cheek, "That's so cute!" He just kept grinning and asked, "Are you my mommy?" I choked back a laugh and ruffled his hair, "Yes I am, but my boy can just call me Olivee ok?" "K!"<p>

I took his hand and led him into the hall where we bumped into Sasori. "Olivia?" "Yes." "Please don't tell me you did it to Kisame." An evil grin popped up on my face, "Ok I won't. Kisame, you remember who this is don't you?"

"Kisame knows, that's Uncle Sasori." "He's such a good boy isn't he?" Sasori's eye twitched and he walked away without a word. No doubt he's going to tell the others. "Olivee?" "Yeah?" "Kisame bored." "Aww, then let's get you a toy." "YAY!"

He happily bounced behind me when we got the storage room and I managed to fish out the legos, coloring book, crayons, and a few stuff animals. He was very excited and I led him into my room to play with them.

"You sit in here and play while mommy gets a snack." He nodded as I kissed him on the forehead. When I left and grabbed me a bag of chips I couldn't believe how cute he was acting like he is. "Olivia!"

Uh-oh. "Yes." Itachi glared and made me sit on the couch, "What's this I hear about you drugging my lover?" "He'll be ok." "That may be but you could've asked my permission first." "Why? No one asks my permission when they want to drug or who knows what with my lovers, or myself for that matter!"

"Hey, is it fucking true?" Hidan came in with the others with a huge grin. "Olivia, did you actually do that to Kisame?" "YES, YES I DID!" Tobi sat next to me, "Tobi never thought Olivee could be so sneaky."

The room got loud with questions until my boy broke the silence. He came flying in, holding up a picture that he colored, "Look what I did mommy!" So much for being called Olivee. I acted very surprised, "It's so pretty. You did such a good job baby!" He grinned from ear to ear and as my luck would have it, the others ruined it.

Talk about gapping mouths and total distraught faces staring at Kisame. It didn't last long when Hidan, Deidara, and Tobi burst out laughing. "HOLY FUCKING JASHIN!" "Did he really just call her mommy un?" "Tobi can't believe his ears!"

The others remained silent with faint smirks. Hidan snatched the coloring book and plops an arm around Deidara, "Just look, it's a fucking rainbow too!" "Not only that, a cute wittle pink bunny un!" Those two were laughing so hard that their faces went pure red and tear stained.

"Give it back." Deidara teasingly hands it out, but when Kisame went to take it he snatched it back. I scowled, "Cut it out you two!" Hidan repeated the action and they laughed even more as Kisame pursed his lips. SMACK! He hit both of them and ran out the room in….believe it or not….tears.

"OW!" "Damn that hurt un!" "Serves you two right for teasing him like that." I stomped off after him with Tobi on my heels, "Olivee, calm down. They were just having some fun; it's rare to see him act like that."

I glared at Tobi, who shrank back with hunched shoulders. "That's no damn excuse to tease him, even if he's not in his right state of mind."

I found that Kisame locked himself in the bathroom and knocked on the door, "Kisame?" "Go away!" "Come on baby, open the door so mommy can come in." "NO!" "Why?" I waited for a response when I heard him shuffle to the door, "Mommy mad at Kisame now."

"No I'm not, why would I be?" "Kisame was bad and hit them." "It's ok, they deserved it. You actually did mommy a favor of doing it herself." Click. The door slowly opened with a pouting Kisame peeking around the corner, "Really?" "Yes, now come here and give mommy some love."

He practically jumped on me and I ended up almost being crushed on the floor. "Olivee!" Tobi managed to haul Kisame up with coaxing. "Is Olivee ok?" I groaned as Tobi helped me up, "Wow. I think I saw my life flash before my eyes."

Tobi murmured, "Be more careful Olivee." "Is mommy ok?" I smiled at him, "Yes I'm fine," and then led Kisame back to my room. "What you doing Olivee?" "My baby needs his pacifier!" "WHAT!"

* * *

><p>*I shut the door and sat on the bed with my back against the wall. The others are rubbing off on me terribly considering what I'm about to do. I exposed my breasts, "Come here Kisame, time for your pacifier."<p>

He hopped over with a smile and gently took a nipple too suck on. I bit back a moan from the tender sucks; he was compelled to play with the neglected one. I drifted my eyes shut but ended up snapping them back open with a groan, "Be careful with those teeth Keesy."

(Nickname I came up with and pronounced: kee – c.)

I let him continue as he switched back and forth for about ten minutes before I couldn't take it anymore. I gently pushed him away and down on his back. He pouted and crossed his arms, "Keesy wasn't done yet."

"I know, but mommy has something special for her boy." "Oooh, what?" "It's a surprise." I reached down and undid his pants to expose his already hardened member. "Wha…..oooooooh!"

He never finished when I suckled on the head and stroked him; he fidgeted wildly and it was difficult to keep him still. "Ah, ah….mommy~" I quickened the strokes and sucked a tad bit harder, making him moan even louder. He sounds like an uke right now.

He bucked his hips up a lot and tensed with a loud moan when he came; that was quick! I pulled back and spit all the cum out in the trash bin as my boy rode the waves of his orgasm all the way out. I fixed my shirt and started to stroke his hair, "Did that feel nice?"

He rubbed his eyes and murmured, "Mmmhmm, Keesy liked a lot." His breathing then turned into deep heavy breaths and that made me smirk. He fell asleep. I smirked and kissed his cheek before leaving the room quietly.

On the way out I bumped into someone. "Kakuzu?" He just stared blankly at me, "Where's Kisame?" "Um, he's taking a nap. Why?" He looked off to the side and yawned, "Tired." I cocked an eyebrow and opened the door to his room, "Go take a nap then. You're never too old to do that." He can be too prideful sometimes.

He simply stared into his room but didn't budge. What's with him? I took his hand and tried to lead him inside but the miser wouldn't go. He planted his feet to the floor and grunted, "Kakuzu? What's wrong?"

He lowered his gaze to the floor and muttered, "Scared." …What did he just say! I reached up and held his face, "What are you scared of Kuzu?" If it wasn't for that mask, I could swear he was pouting, "The dark." HELL JUST FROZE OVER!

"I see. I'll be right back." I casually enter the living room and sat on Hidan's lap, "Oh Hidan, darling." He raised his eyebrows and tilted his head, "Yeah?" "What did you do?"

He smirked and averted eye contact, "Nothing." I took his chin and made him face me, "You gave Kakuzu the baby drug didn't you?"

He smirked and gave me a small kiss, "What if I fucking did?" I sighed, "Nothing. I was just checking since he won't go into his room to take a nap since he's now afraid of the dark." "You're fucking shitting me?" "Nope!"

* * *

><p>We went back into the hall and found Kakuzu still standing there. Before Hidan could act I whispered menacingly in his ear, "Don't you dare tease him and make it worse." He gave me a fixed look, "Give me some fucking credit, I'm not that cruel." "You were with Kisame."<p>

He sighed, "Alright I fucking see your point." Hidan turned the light on in their room and took his lovers hand, "Come on Kuzu, there's nothing to be fucking afraid of." Kakuzu was hesitant but only took a few steps forward.

I watched in utter amusement as Hidan tried to coax him in, but to no avail. His patience wore off as I knew it would, but did something stupid just when Kakuzu about took a step past the doorframe. "If you don't get your fucking ass in here already, I'm letting the boogey man get you!"

I face palmed. Kakuzu's eyes grew wide and jerked his hand away before dashing to the bathroom and locking himself in. "Way to go Hidan." "Kakuzu, open this fucking door!" No answer.

BAM! BAM! "I mean it old man; get your fucking ass out here right now!" "Hidan!" I covered his mouth, "Get a grip and be quiet! He's not coming out if you talk to him like that you idiot." He snorted, "But…." "No buts, just leave and let me handle this."

He scowled as he left and I tapped on the door. "Kakuzu?" No answer. "It's ok Kuzu, please open the door for mommy." Well, if I have one boy why not two? I was very surprised that he opened the door and came out.

"Daddy's mean." I held his hand, "I know he is, but he's learning to control that temper." He bent over and hugged my neck, "My Kuzu still tired?" He nodded and I gently pushed him back, "Come on, you can take a nap in my room."

I had to turn the light on and stay by his side before he actually went in there. I tucked him into Tobi's bed and lowered my voice as to not wake Kisame, "Now you be good and go to sleep." I went to leave but he pulled me back, "Don't leave."

I sat on the edge of the bed, "Why honey?" "Kuzu don't want to be left alone." He's SO cute and vulnerable! "You won't be alone, Kisame's right over there." "K." I took off his mask/hood, "Want me to leave the door open so it won't be dark."

He smirked. I take that as a yes. "Good night honey." "Kiss." "Hmm?" "Kuzu want kiss goodnight." I smiled and gave him a deep kiss on the lips before he turned over and fell asleep. I tiptoed out the room and turned the light back off but left the door wide open like I said I would.

* * *

><p>*I found Hidan sulking on the couch with Deidara and Tobi trying to giving him tips how to handle a toddler; after all, they went through it as I did.<p>

"Look, I just don't have the fucking patience for it all right!" I sat next to him, "Well how do you think it's going to be when it's time for me to bear yours/Jashin's children?" Hidan was indifferent on the matter, "That's why I fucking have you."

I tensed and smacked his arm, "If you think you're going to dump them on me just because you don't want to deal with it you have another thing coming! If that's the way you feel then I'm not having your brats."

"BRATS!" He glared at me and I gladly returned it. "Settle down you two, I'm sure Hidan will take responsibility for his offspring when the time comes un." "Tobi agrees. Hidan don't really care right now because they're not really his kids. This is just pretend."

I glanced over at him and Hidan nodded, "Hmph, that's actually fucking true. Never thought of it like that." He held my hand and put on a cocky smirk, "I'm fucking sorry. Will you change your mind and have my brats."

"Can't you apologize without the curse words for once? I can't tell half the time if you're being serious or not." He scowled and attacked me with a kiss, "How's that baby?" I found that action funny and nodded, "I forgive you."

*Some time later, Kisame and Kakuzu woke up and we ended up having a ball with them. Sasori and Itachi couldn't take seeing them like that so they went over to Zetsu's. Something about they'll lose all respect for them if they kept watching.

Hidan was combing his lover's hair, which was lying on his stomach and couldn't keep still. "Stop squirming!" Hidan straddled his back to hold him down, "Get off daddy!" "Not until I'm finished!" "Kuzu don't like it!" Hidan mumbled under his breath, "That much hasn't changed."

I couldn't stop myself from laughing at them. Kakuzu was kicking his feet and thrashing his hands on the floor like a kid having a tantrum. At least Hidan got the handful and not me; Kisame wasn't bad.

Right now he was combing Deidara's long blonde hair with fascination. "Are you through yet un?" "Almost Deidei." Deidara flinched at his previous nickname and glowered at Tobi. "Don't look at Tobi sempai. Tobi didn't tell him." That gaze turned to me, "What? It's cute."

He rolled his eyes, "Oh well, you're lucky I like having my hair combed or I'd be long gone by now un." "AGHHHH!" Hidan bit back a LOT of curses and glared at Kakuzu. "What happened un?"

"The fucker bit me!" "Why did you do that to daddy Kuzu?" The miser made a face, "Daddy hurt Kuzu." "I did not!" "Did too!" "Did not!" "DID TOO!" "DID NOT!"

Tobi sniggered, "Why does this not surprise Tobi?" "That makes two of us un." "Ditto." Hidan finally shut up and asked, with an attitude of course, "How did I supposedly hurt you?" "Pulled Kuzu's hair!" "There was a knot!" "DON'T CARE IT HURT!"

"I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT REALLY HURTS KUZU!" He turned around and started spanking him hard. I can't believe what I'm seeing; Kakuzu is getting spanked by Hidan! Usually it's reversed if that happens.

"STOP IT DADDY!" "THIS IS FOR GIVING YOUR DADDY LIP AND BEING A BAD BOY!" Apparently this punishment scared Kisame since he buried his face in my lap and wrapped his arms around my waist. I stroked his hair to calm him down, "Hidan that's enough. I think you proved your point."

* * *

><p>He stopped mid-slap and took some deep breaths. "Fine." He got off Kakuzu and went into the kitchen staring at his hand. "Keesy, can mommy get up please." "No." "It's all over now." He warily let me go and latched on to Tobi instead. He did the same thing I did to calm him down.<p>

I went over and knelt down to my lover noticing he didn't shed a tear; still the tough miser. "Kuzu hate daddy." I smirked and rubbed his back, "You shouldn't hate him Kuzu. He IS your daddy even though he's not mature like us." He nodded and glanced up at me, "Can Kuzu spend time with mommy now?"

Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Him calling me mommy is beyond words for me to describe. "Sure you can honey." I led him over to the couch and sat down, with him resting his head on my lap. Deidara left and soon came back with the legos I had in my room.

"Sempai?" "Shut up I'm bored un." It wasn't long before I kept hearing a low noise. Deidara heard it too and we scanned the room. "What is that?" It was like a low humming sound. I quickly found out, "Tobi?" Deidara face palmed, "Not the pacifier again un!"

Tobi just grinned innocently as Kisame sucked on his pacifier. Deidara and I couldn't take our eyes off it but my attention was immediately turned away to something more interesting. Without me noticing, Kakuzu had already got a hold of my breast and started sucking on a nipple. Deidara's mouth dropped and when Hidan came in, he did the same. "Wait a fucking minute! If he gets to have a tit I want the other one!"

I shook my head, "Sorry but no, daddy hasn't been a good boy like Kuzu." "That's not fucking funny." "What about me? I've been a good boy un." "Yes you have Deidei, I'll give you the other." Hidan pointed threateningly at the blonde, "If you fucking get out of that chair I will fucking beat your ass with the paddle!"

Deidara grinned nervously and went back to his legos. "Keesy! Tobi flung his head back from gaining his sweet release and Kisame brought his head up with a smile.

"Olivia?" Hidan had this evil grin, "Uh, yeah?" He choked back a chuckle, "I didn't know you were fucking breast feeding already." "YOU LITTLE SHIT!" My yell made Kakuzu jump while Hidan and Deidara laughed.

"Mommy?" "I'm sorry Kuzu, mommy didn't mean to yell." Hidan took that opportunity to haul Kakuzu away from me, "That's enough of that." Kisame ran over to me and scooped me up in a hug, "Keesy got mommy all to himself now!"

"Looks that way un." "Olivee can't even touch the floor." That was true but not surprising considering the height difference. "Keesy, can you put mommy down." "No."

"Well, then can you carry mommy into bathroom so she can give you a bath then." "Ok!" "NO FAIR!" Hidan covered his ears, "Ow, what's not fair Kuzu?" "Why can't Kuzu go too?" Hidan about made a snide remark when I interrupted him, "Hidan, come on. He can come too."

*Bath time was fun, though VERY awkward at the same time. We didn't get any trouble until we dried them off. Kakuzu was obviously jealous that my attention was on Kisame and kept trying to switch places; making Hidan agitated and bickering.

"Hidan, just dry Keesy off and stop griping." That made Kakuzu happy and Hidan was MEAN when it came to dressing them. We just put some normal slacks on and didn't bother with a shirt, it's just he decided to put something in their hair.

I shouldn't of, but I did it too. Kakuzu now had two purple bows above both ears and I put a pink one off to the side for Kisame. Hidan tried so hard not to laugh, "Aren't they so fucking cute?" "Yes they are, too cute if you ask me."

* * *

><p>We just brought them back into the living room when the other two howled with laughter, along with us. "What the hell is so funny?" "I don't find anything amusing!" The laughter instantly stopped; the drug wore off.<p>

"Olivia, mind explaining what you did to me?" "Same goes for you Hidan." Kisame glanced over at Kakuzu and his eyes got big, "Kakuzu?" He turned but his reaction was different, he pursed his lips, "Kisame?"

They both somewhat calmly leave and head into the bathroom. "You two are so dead un." "Tobi knows they're going to see the bows." I sarcastically shook Hidan's hand, "Nice knowing you Hidan, it's been great." "Same here, I might not see you for a fucking while."

"HIDANNNNNN!" "OLIVIAAAAAAA!" Hidan and I both ran like hell before a VERY peeved Kakuzu and Kisame came flying into the living room. I ran out the door to Zetsu's and threw myself on his door when I got there, "Zetsu let me in!"

Kisame came out of the apartment and spotted me. "SHIT!" I ran like hell, not having a clue to where I was going but he easily caught up to me. I can't outrun any of them even if I wanted to. He threw me onto his shoulder none too gently and brought me back to the apartment.

We met Sasori on the way back, "You're back to normal I see." Kisame just grunted something I couldn't hear. He followed us into the apartment and saw that Kakuzu caught Hidan. He had him gagged and tied up with his threads with him over his shoulder as well.

"What's the problem you two?" Kakuzu growled, "What's the problem you ask. I'll tell you what the damn problem is! How would you like to wake up and find bows in your hair like a girl!" Kisame nodded, "Who knows what else they fucking did to make fools of us!"

He smacked my behind after his statement and made me gasp. Sasori frowned, "I know exactly how it feels to be made like a fool or have you two forgotten this past week's events?" Kisame narrowed his eyes, "No but let's change the subject. I would like to have a word with you Sasori before I begin to punish her."

Kakuzu grunted, "The same goes for me as well." Sasori sighed, "Very well."

Hidan and I were released but not before being warned, "If you so much as get off this couch Hidan, your punishment will be even worse." "The same goes for you too Olivia." We nodded and clung to each other as they left the room.

*It was ten minutes when Sasori called us into his room, after getting permission from the shark and miser of course. We found him sitting in a chair with his arms crossed, "It's time to discuss my payment for the drug."

"What's there to fucking discuss? I've already fucking agreed to pay money for it." "I did too." Sasori shook his head, "Before I continue go and get my compensation please." We did and handed him the money when he continued, "Now that's settled, there is another fine for you two to pay."

"Eh?" "What the fuck Sasori?" "Let me finish! Another negotiation has been forced upon you two due to these issues." He motioned for us to turn around and there stood Kakuzu and Kisame blocking the doorway.

Sweatdrop. We were speechless and Sasori pointed at both of us, "You're to reimburse Kakuzu and Kisame now." Those two behemoths were grinning evilly from ear to ear and Kakuzu waved a small packet at Hidan.

"No fucking way! Don't you fucking dare old man!" Kakuzu binded him with his threads and cupped his chin, "Is that any way to speak to your soon to be father Hidan?" His eye twitched and was silent; he knew he couldn't get out of this. "No talking back? That's my boy."

He covered his mouth to muffle the curses now that Hidan's over his shock and led him away. "Olivia?" I tensed as Kisame beckoned me over with a finger. I timidly go to him, regretting immensely that I drugged him now, as he firmly gripped the back of my neck.

He guided me to his room before whispering in my ear, "Looks like my little girl needs to be punished." I paled and muttered, "But I…" He pressed a finger to my lips, "I'm afraid you're not getting the drug. I want my girl conscious when her papa disciplines her."

Why do I have a feeling this is going to hurt?

**FINI!**

**Surprised all of you didn't I? **

**On the votes if was definitely between Kisame and Kakuzu so I decided to put them both! TOO FUNNY!  
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**I hope everyone liked this story as much as I did! On this chapter I couldn't stop laughing myself **


	8. Baby Hidan and Olivee's Punishment

Other POV

"AGHHHHHHH!" "I SAID NO HIDAN!" "GIMME! GIMME!" Kakuzu was holding a dagger above his head that Hidan wanted to play with, who was desperately trying to jump up and get it. "FATHER! GIVE IT!" Kakuzu thought to himself; _He's even more irritating than usual!_

He'd already successfully drugged him, with bondage and force since Hidan wouldn't go down without a fight. Kakuzu found it irritating with the yelling over a stupid dagger that he shouldn't even be attracted to. _That's Hidan for you._

Hidan finally gave up and pouted with his face all red from yelling. He sniffed and pushed Kakuzu, "So mean!" He flopped onto the bed and started crying. Kakuzu rolled his eyes and put the dagger away before sitting next to him.

Hidan tried to push him away but he was pinned down, "LET GO YOU STINKY BUTT!" Kakuzu stopped momentarily hearing that laughable insult, "What did you call me?" "YOU A FAT STINKY BUTT!"

Kakuzu couldn't take it anymore; he leaned down and growled into his ear, "Hidan's being a bad boy for insulting his father like that. This calls for some _painful _punishment."

Hidan stopped struggling and stared wide eyed at his father, "Pain?" "Yes, lots of pain." The jashinist feebly shook his head no and whimpered, "No punish Hidan, he sorry." "Too late for that sonny boy."

Kakuzu jerked off his slacks/boxers and flipped him over onto his lap. Hidan squirmed and tried to get away but he was quickly bound with the threads to hold him down. Kakuzu brought his hand down on that delicate behind and spanked him hard.

"Father hurting Hidan!" Said man snorted, "That's the point!" With each smack Hidan cried out and whimpered with tears. "Hidan sorry! Hidan sorry!" Kakuzu smirked at his whimpering lover and stopped after a few more smacks.

When he finally withdrew the threads Hidan sniffled into the sheets. Kakuzu picked him up and held him, "Have you learned your lesson Hidan?" "Yeah." "No more name calling?" "Nuh-uh."

Hidan wrapped his arms around his neck and nuzzled his face into his shoulder. "Hidan so sorry for being bad!" Kakuzu chuckled softly and petted his hair, "Father forgives you."

* * *

><p><span>My POV<span>

I was sitting on the bed waiting for my sentence. "What to do with you?" Kisame was tapping a finger against his chin in deep thought. I just have this feeling it's not going to be good for me…and hurt.

"Stand up." I wasn't exactly paying attention and that made him frown, "Don't make me repeat myself." I warily did as I was told when he gave me a cruel smirk. "Strip." I blinked a few times thinking I heard it wrong, "Come again?"

That grin just got wider, "I _said_ strip." "Why?" Kisame let out a sigh, "Don't forget the role we're playing here or you'll suffer even more. Now, try again." Shit! "Um, why papa?" "That's better. As for your question….you'll do as you're told."

I flinched from his callous tone and timidly began to remove my clothes. He's got a smug grin plastered on his face too. What's he planning? Once I was completely in the nude he ordered, "Get on the bed and bend over on all fours."

Dirty thoughts were streaming through my head as I did what he wanted. Kisame approached and rested a hand on my lower back before I felt a hard slap on my behind and a lot more to go with it. "Tell me, isn't this what papa's are supposed to do when their daughters have been bad?"

I pursed my lips and tried not to cry but it stung. "Answer me!" "It is papa, ow!" He stopped to pat me on the head, "Good girl, but that's not the punishment I'm going to give you." He got behind me after I saw him stick some fingers in his mouth.

No, he's not considering _that_? My thought was answered when he glided a moistened finger into my anal entrance. I gasped from the weird feeling and hissed when he added two more. I gritted through my teeth, "Damn it."

Kisame chuckled and kept right on probing and scissoring in order to stretch me. I hope he's not planning on sticking something bigger in there. Shit, it hurts as it is and yet feels good at the same time.

Once he removed his fingers I felt something cool run between my cheeks and turned to see it was lube. After he did that and lubed his cock, he positioned himself much to my dismay. I instantly tried to pull away but was only brought back, "Oh, so my girl does know what's going to happen."

I felt the head push in just a hair and that was enough to hurt. I lunged forward and like last time I was pulled back, "You're not getting out of this one." He proceeded to push in again, "Kisame stop, you know I HATE doing it anal!"

It's true, doing it anally isn't something I'm quite fond of; through experimentation with my lovers of course.

It hurts too much as a girl and there's no prostate to hit like for a guy, so I don't really get anything out of it; unless there's something else in the other entrance. It's kinky when it's just fingers but other than that….HELL NO!

"You're disobeying me." He pushed in more and caused me to whine, "I'm sorry papa, I'm sorry!" He kept gently pushing and my ass felt like it was on fire it stung so badly. "Please stop, it hurts."

Kisame ignored me and kept going in until he was completely sheathed despite my cries of pain. He was at least nice enough to let me adjust but it still hurt like a son of a bitch. I was already crying and he stroked my hair. "Take it out." "Have you already forgotten that this is your punishment?"

I feebly shook my head no when he slowly pulled out and thrust back in. He began thrusting at a slow pace but it soon became hard and fast. I buried my face into the sheets and clung to them as I whimpered and groaned loudly from my punishment.

With each thrust I was practically being pounded into the bed, biting the sheets to keep myself from crying out more. The only thing going through my head was for him to hurry up and cum already.

* * *

><p>"Hey, this isn't the bathroom? Where am…..EH?" Kisame didn't stop what he was doing as Hidan stood in the doorway with his mouth hanging wide open. He frantically waved his arms and yelled, "FATHER! BIG BLUE GUY HURTING MOMMY!"<p>

That outburst actually got me grinning….the big blue guy; that's a new one. I heard footsteps coming down the hall but at that point Kisame gripped my hips tighter and came with a groan, thus making me cry out.

Kakuzu entered the room with Hidan pointing and tugging on his sleeve. "This is her punishment Kisame?" "Yeah." I groaned when he pulled out of me and I collapsed; thank jashin that's over. Kakuzu rushed over and took a quick look at me. "Why does she look like she's in pain?"

Kisame put some pants on but I answered before he did, "Because she…ngh….IS in pain!" "You didn't?" "Yeah I did." "YOU IDIOT!" "WHAT?" "She doesn't like doing it anal for one and not to mention, there's not a pleasure spot!"

They were both in each other's face fuming with anger. "That's what punishment is Kakuzu!" "Beat him up Father!" "Be quite Hidan!" "Sorry." "How quickly we forget Kisame, she's NOT a ninja. Her body won't recover quickly like ours would. Did you even think about that?"

Before Kakuzu went to scoop me up Kisame turned him around and glared menacingly, "No! How quickly we forgot about what you did to her before!"

….Kisame should NOT have brought _that_ up. Sure enough, Kakuzu was beyond livid and punched Kisame in the face and was returned with one. I shakily stood and wobbled over (despite the agonizing pain) to separate them like a moron. "Please stop."

They actually did for a moment until Kakuzu carefully picked me up and stomped out the room with Hidan right on his trail.

* * *

><p>*Kakuzu began to run a bath with Hidan extremely curious. "Is mommy ok?" "No Hidan." I glanced up at Kakuzu, "I'm fine." He held me closer on his lap and ran his fingers through my hair, "Damn bastard….."<p>

I reached up and stroked his cheek, "It's ok." "No it's not! He could've really injured you in more ways than one and he just had to bring _that_ up."

I didn't say anything when he turned the water off. "Don't worry, it's all in the past and you did it out of anger mostly just like what Kisame just did. You know he wouldn't throw that in your face on purpose."

He sighed and kissed my neck, "I know but it still pisses me off none the less." I kissed him and smiled when Hidan suddenly started to giggle, "Guess what father?" "What?" He buried his face in his hands, "Mommy's naked."

I laughed and Kakuzu just scowled as he lowered me into the tub. I hissed from the contact but it passed quick enough; at least Kakuzu seemed to be a tad bit more cheerful state. "Can Hidan take bath with mommy?" "No."

"Why? Hidan's been good!" "Don't question me, the answer is no." Hidan took an unexpected action that I NEVER would have seen happen if not for this drug.

He scrunched up his face and turned all red before flailing his arms and legs screaming, "HIDAN HATE FATHER! WHY HE SO MEAN WHEN HIDAN'S BEEN GOOD! FATHER FAT STINKY SCARECROW!"

Kakuzu got angry again and jerked him up by the arm and slapped him, "What did I tell you about name calling?" I smirked, "Kakuzu, just let him come in here. He's not going to hurt nothing." "Tch, fine!"

"YAY!" "Wow! That was a quick temper tantrum." Hidan stripped his clothes off and joined me. Hidan is just too funny.

* * *

><p>*Once the bath was over and changed, I was in need of some R&amp;R. Mostly because it hurt to walk. "Hey Olivia un." "Hmm?"<p>

Deidara sat next to me and asked, "What's going on between Kisame and Kakuzu? They've been glaring at each other the whole time while you and Hidan were taking a bath un."

Sasori was curious too, "As of now they went outside and from what I can tell they're quarrelling about something." "Kakuzu told him off when he found out about my punishment and Kisame said something back that he shouldn't have said."

Deidara frowned, "I pity you on getting that punishment un." "What did he mention to Kakuzu?" I sighed, "You remember that week when I had to do anything Deidara said so he would do that jutsu for me?" "Yes."

"Well, on the truth or dare game I was asked why I didn't talk back to Kakuzu and when I gave the reason why….that's what Kisame brought up."

"No wonder he looked pissed un." "He's still sore about it then?" "Only if it gets thrown back in his face which Kisame did. I hope they're working it out." "Me too, Kisame's not like that unless his anger gets the better of him un."

"MOMMY!" Deidara tried so hard not to laugh when Hidan came flying into the living room. "Hidan hungry mommy!"

I was about to suggest something for him when Deidara covered my mouth, "Alright, but Hidan has to wait a few minutes ok un?"

A pout was his response, "Aww, ok." Deidara whispered to me, "I have an idea un." "I had a feeling." "Danna, could you tend to Hidan for a few minutes since his mommy isn't up to it un?" Sasori smirked and got up, "Why not? Come along Hidan."

He took Hidan's hand and led him away somewhere, "Where we going Uncle Sasori?" "You'll see." "Um, Deidara?" "Yeah un?" "Is he going to do something sexual to him?" "No clue, but I need to get his bottle un!"

An idea popped into my head, "Dei, get this for him too." I whispered it into his ear and he grinned from ear to ear, "That's mean but I love it un."

He rushed off to get the necessary items and then went straight to the kitchen. It's a good thing he did since Sasori came back with Hidan; if Deidara saw him he wouldn't had made it into the kitchen.

"Look mommy look! Uncle Sasori made Hidan pretty!" I wish I had a camera. He had two little pigtails with lavender bows. "You look so cute baby!" He smiled that goofy grin of his and snuggled up next to me. "What possessed you to make him 'pretty' Sasori?'

He smirked, "Just a whim." "A good one I have to admit." "Ok Hidan, here's your milk un!" Hidan leaped up and glomped Deidara, who barely restrained himself from laughing when he saw his hair. He sat on the couch and almost gave him the bottle when I pointed out, "Don't forget Dei."

"Oh right." He put a cute bib on him that was pink and had a little yellow ducky on it. "You two are going to be killed when he comes to." "We'll just blame it on Kakuzu un."

* * *

><p>Kisame and Kakuzu walked in and I muttered, "Speak of the devil." They wore solemn expressions but that soon changed to smug grins when they saw Hidan. "If I didn't see it with my own eyes I wouldn't believe it."<p>

"Even I pity Hidan on that." "Yep a foul mouthed tough guy in pigtails, a bib, and drinking out of a baby bottle. He's going to kill you two." "Nah, we have a plan." "So uh, did you guys work it out un?" They glanced at each other and muttered, "For the time being."

*It wasn't long before Tobi came in with Itachi and they had the same reactions. "Can Tobi do something with Hidan when sempai done feeing him?" "I guess un." Hidan just got through with his milk and Deidara handed him over to Tobi.

We all watched anxiously; knowing Tobi it'll be funny as hell. He leaned Hidan against his shoulder and patted his back a few times until we heard a burp. "OH HELL!" "YOU DIDN'T JUST BURP HIM TOBI!"

Talk about everyone howling with laughter until, "What the fuck is so funny?" "That didn't last long un." Hidan was baffled and clueless as to why everyone was still chuckling at him. He jumped up and stood in front of Kakuzu, "What the fuck did you do to me old man?"

The miser smirked, "Nothing at all." He pinched his cheek before his hand got slapped away. "Hidan?" "What?"

Itachi grinned, "You might want to see yourself in a mirror." Hidan's eyes grew wide and ran off to the bathroom. Three, two, one….. "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?"

He came flying in, jerking off the bib and bows, "WHO IN FUCK DID THIS SHIT TO ME?" "Kakuzu." The miser scowled at me in shock, "Olivia?"

"YOU FUCKING OLD MAN, YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY TO MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A FUCKING PUSSY?"

"Let's not forget the baby bottle un." "W-What? That fucking too?" Tobi giggled, "Not to mention getting burped. Hidan was so cute." "ALL OF YOU JUST SUCK MY BALLS!"

"Don't tempt me." Hidan shot his lover a glare and stomped off pissed off as hell.

"Poor Hidan." "He'll be alright once he calms down." Sasori smirked, "I can't wait to show him the recording on his punishment." "As long as you don't show him mine."

Kakuzu nodded in agreement and Kisame muttered, "I won't hear the end of it."

"At least we can say your punishment is over Olivia." "That's good Itachi because I'm going to be sore for a few days." Tobi hugged me, "Tobi just glad this baby thing is over finally." **"Who says?" **

We all turned to Zetsu, who just emerged from the ground with an evil grin. "What do you mean Zetsu?" "I do believe only one person here has not been subjected to this week's events." **"They need to go through it too; it's only fair."**

Deidara tilted his head in thought, "Let's see, who wasn't involved?" Tobi counted, "Well, Sasori, Zetsu, and Hidan were parents. Tobi, sempai, and Olivee were babies, then Kisame, Kakuzu and Hidan."

"Tobi, you weren't drugged at all." "But Tobi was treated just like them so it counts!" Sasori tapped his fingers on his leg, "Taking that into account that leaves….."

We all turned to Itachi. "Don't you lot even consider it!"

**Okay Okay, I'll do one more chapter just for you readers who are dying to see a baby Itachi lol. This'll be fun XD  
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***If anyone doesn't know what Kisame was referring to on what Kakuzu did to her, it's on my Seven Days story. Chapter 9.**


	9. Nurse Itachi?

"HOLD HIM DOWN!" Kisame, Kakuzu, and Hidan lunged at Itachi, who was about to activate his sharingan until Zetsu appeared behind him and covered his eyes. "Give him the drug quick!"

Sasori had already mixed it once the others attacked the raven and pushed the glass to his lips. Itachi fought tooth and nail to get out of their clutches and pursed his lips tightly. Deidara, Tobi, and I stayed out of it; we were NOT getting involved with his one.

An idea came to Sasori and left the room, coming back a second later with a long dropper and filling it up with the drink. Kakuzu held his nose and Itachi didn't crack open his mouth until his face was practically blue. He obviously did not want to get the baby drug.

Once his lips cracked just a hair, Sasori forced the dropper inside and squirted all the contents into the back of his throat, pinching a nerve in his neck to make him swallow. He started to cough but within only a few moments his body relaxed and went limp.

They cautiously let him go aside from Zetsu, who was still covering his eyes as a safety precaution. Kisame sat next to him and asked gently, "Is Itachi alright?" The raven tilted his head to the voice and murmured, "Can't see."

"**There's no menacing tone to his voice so I do believe we got him." **He let go of him and Itachi rubbed his eyes once he could see. He stared around the room with curiosity, "Why is everyone staring at Itachi?"

They all sighed and relaxed, thinking it was an act and he'd pull them into his Tsukuyomi. Kisame chuckled and sat Itachi on his lap, "Everyone's staring because they can't get over how beautiful you are."

Itachi smiled and buried his face into Kisame's shoulder out of embarrassment. "So, now what?" "We're going to fucking play with him that's what!"

* * *

><p>*Sasori dragged Itachi into the other room and came out in five minutes with him wearing different clothes. "WHAT THE FUCK!" Kisame instantly got a nosebleed and grabbed a wad of tissues while the rest of us blushed with our mouths hanging open.<p>

Itachi was pouting on the floor with a slight blush in a baby pink, naughty nurse outfit! It was a fitted mini dress with a sweetheart neckline with matching thigh high, white stockings. His hair was even in loose, braided pigtails with red bows attached to them.

After the heated tension eased off Zetsu asked, "Question. Where are these bows coming from?" Tobi rolled his eyes, "You parents bought them for your babies." Hidan, Sasori, and Zetsu all scowled, not believing they got those things….but they did.

Deidara stared at Itachi's hair, "Danna? Since when can you braid un?" Sasori shrugged, "I dabbled at it with your hair while you were asleep." Deidara's face turned red and I decided to change the subject before Hidan would make fun of him.

"Are you ok Itachi?" He shook his head no and murmured, "Bored." Hidan grinned evilly and muttered, "I can play with you if you want Itachi?"

Kisame scooped his lover up, now over his nosebleed, and sat him in between his legs with a smug grin. "If anyone is going to play with him, it's going to be me." "Aw fuck."

*A half hour passed by quickly enough and Itachi seemed to be more cheerful than earlier. He played with the building blocks and colored a while before Tobi want to play doctor.

"Come on Olivee! Play doctor with Tobi and Itachi." Itachi shook my arm, "Please Olivee please!" This is just too cute. "Ok ok, as long as I don't have to move too much." Say to safe I'm still sore from earlier. Tobi patted my head, "Olivee won't have to, she going to be the patient."

Next thing I knew, they had me stretch out across the couch and had a thermometer in my mouth. Tobi had his akatsuki robe on with a stethoscope hanging around his neck and a doctor's hat on. Where did that come from, better yet, the outfit Itachi was wearing? First time I've seen any of this stuff.

Everyone else just watched in amusement at the show. Tobi checked my pulse and murmured, "Pulse is ok and temperature." He took the thermometer out and handed it to Itachi, who stuck it in a small bag.

* * *

><p>"Nurse Itachi." "Yes Doctor Tobi?" "Bring Doctor Tobi his gloves." "Yes sir." Itachi handed Tobi his usual black gloves and he slipped them on. "Now Olivee, this might feel slightly uncomfortable."<p>

I stared at him nervously, not having a clue what he's about to do. He roughly grabbed my breasts and squeezed them. "OW!" Tobi gasped and jumped up, "Oh no! Just as Tobi feared!" I clutched my breasts scowling at him, "What'd you do that for?"

Itachi jumped up too all concerned, "What's wrong with Olivee Doctor Tobi?" "Her breasts are tender to the touch Nurse Itachi and that's bad. Bring me the syringe!" I sat up in a flash and tried to get off the couch but Tobi grabbed me by the shoulders, "The patient is trying to escape! Help Tobi hold her down nurse!"

I kept struggling but not too much as Itachi held me down while Tobi reached into the bag and pulled out a syringe. My eyes grew wide, "DON'T YOU DARE STICK ME WITH THAT!" Tobi smirked and pushed me down with his free hand, "This is for Olivee's own good and won't hurt a bit."

I saw that needle come flying down at my chest and closed my eyes fearing for the worst….but it didn't come. I felt slight pressure between my breasts and peeked open an eye to see…shit. Tobi gently rubbed the spot and asked soothingly, "Does Olivee feel all better?"

I made a face at him and glared at the others. "What's with that face un?" "You lot COULD have gave me a heads up that the needle was a kids toy!" Kakuzu chuckled, "You honestly believe we would let Tobi stick you with a real syringe?"

"I'm surprised you fell for that Olivia." I grumbled, "I couldn't see it Sasori." Tobi patted Itachi on the shoulder, "Great job Nurse Itachi, but what's this?" Itachi noticed, "Doctor Tobi, she's breathing awful heavy!"

"Good eye nurse, Olivee's hyperventilating." "Stand aside you fuckers; let Doctor Hidan have a look." Oh no, not him! Hidan pushed them aside and placed a firm hand on my breast. "Mmmhmm, her heart is beating very fast. This is NOT fucking good."

"What did you expect, I about had a heart attack." "No talking!" He motioned for Itachi to come closer, "How long has this been going on nurse?" Itachi shook his head sadly, "Several minutes Doctor Hidan."

Hidan sighed, "Just as I feared but no worries my fellow subordinates. This fucking calls for mouth to mouth!" Before I knew it he latched his lips onto my mouth kissing me fiercely. I tried to push him away to get my breath back.

He brought his head back up and took a deep breath of air. "Doctor Tobi! Nurse Itachi! Help me fucking hold her down. This one is a fighter!" They both held me down as he kissed me again and then left, "Come on woman breath!"

* * *

><p>"Hid…" I couldn't finish as I was lip locked again. "It's not fucking working! Give her the shock Doctor Tobi!" <strong>"Don't you mean the defibrillator Hidan?"<strong> "Whatever! Hurry Tobi before we lose her!"

Tobi rubbed his hands together before taking hold onto my nipples. "Don't you da…" "Clear!" He pinched them and my back arched up off the couch with a groan. "Again." "No not again!" "Clear!" I arched up again but didn't have time to breath when Hidan got my mouth again.

I'm going to suffocate if this keeps up. Thankfully they only did it three more times before, "SUCCESS!" Tobi and Hidan shook hands, "Good work Doctor Hidan, we couldn't have saved her without you."

"No problem Doctor Tobi, I know I'm good." The only thing that I could hear right now, aside from those two gloating, was everyone else howling with laughter. Itachi smiled at me and held my hand, "Does Olivee feel alright?"

Truthfully, hell no I didn't. My nipples were hurting but I didn't say so to him. "Thank you Nurse Itachi, you saved my life." He grinned happily and went over to hug Kisame, "Did you see what Itachi did!"

Kisame wiped a few tears away and ruffled his hair, "I did and you were magnificent Itachi." He sat him on his lap and cuddled with him as Tobi loomed over me, "Did Olivee have fun?" "I would've if you didn't squeeze so hard."

He hugged my neck, "Tobi sorry Olivee. Tobi just got caught up in the moment." Hidan sat back in his chair with a smug grin, "Next time me, her and you are going to fucking play doctor." Kakuzu smirked, "I do admit, it does sound rather fun."

* * *

><p>*Time went by once again but this time it went in a different direction. Everyone was off doing their thing and I think I was the only one in the room, trying to doze off but I kept hearing Kisame and Itachi so I turned and looked.<p>

Kisame was sitting behind Itachi horny as hell and started to slide up his dress. "Hmm?" Itachi was confused as to what was going on, especially when that hand reached inside his shorts and fondled his member.

Itachi scrunched up his face and clung to the couch, "W..Wha…Papa?" Kisame trailed kisses down his neck as he gently pumped his lover's length but…..Itachi didn't like it. I could see that plain as day from that expression.

A few tears slid down his flushed cheeks and whimpered, "N…No…don't touch Itachi there….please…..it bad." This isn't looking good and I don't think Kisame is catching on. He kept right on fondling him but failing to get him erect at all.

"Come on Itachi relax." He feebly tried to take his hand out but Kisame wasn't letting up, "Don't…." "Kisame?" "What?" I sat up, "You need to go ahead and stop." He scowled but stopped doing it; perfect timing too since a few others came in the room.

Itachi took that opportunity to latch onto Deidara and buried his face into his long hair. Poor Deidara was dumbfounded and gently patted his back, "Uh, its ok Itachi un." He gave me a look and I pointed at Kisame.

Sasori gave him a questionable glance, "What did you do to him?" "I was just trying to get intimate with him and he started crying. He thought it was wrong." Deidara knitted his eyebrows, "That's a new reaction to the baby drug. Apparently he thinks Papa Kisame isn't supposed to do that un."

Kisame rolled his eyes and muttered, "Just my luck." Everyone else found it amusing when they found out a few minutes later but what really got me was how loving Itachi was being with Deidara.

He only wanted to be with him and cuddle with him and no one else. Especially not Kisame but he didn't know he'd react that way, none of us did. It wasn't long when Itachi began to yawn and wanted to go take a nap.

"Itachi tired Deidei." The blonde flinched at that nickname again muttering, "Now how the hell did he hear that un?" He took his hand and led him into his own room, not daring to put him in his own room just in case Kisame tried again.

"Get in un." Itachi snuggled under the covers but kept a tight hold on Deidara's hand. "What's wrong un?" He pouted, "Take nap with Itachi Deidei?" "Why un?" "Don't want to be alone." Deidara sighed, "Alright, but let me tell the others un."

* * *

><p><span>Deidara POV<span>

After he informed the other, he got into bed with him and laid there staring up at the ceiling. He wasn't tired at all but Itachi fell asleep right off the bat, snuggling next to him. It's been fifteen minutes now and Deidara couldn't exactly get away so he rested his eyes, but in no time they shot back open.

Itachi was moaning in his sleep and softly grinding himself against his side. _Is he having a wet dream un? _He gently shook him and woke him up, groaning as he did. Itachi stuck his lower lip out slightly at Deidara with a blush, "Deidei, Itachi feel funny."

_That is so damn adorable it's not even funny un! _He turned over and faced him, "How so un?" "He hot and…wants Deidei….to touch him." With those few words, the blonde's hormones went into overdrive and he was raring to go.

He gently pushed him onto his back and slid the shorts and dress off him. He wasn't wasting any time when he then slid his tongue up the bottom of his semi-hard member before swirling his tongue around the tip, fingers teasing the bottom of his shaft before he took Itachi completely into his mouth.

He felt Itachi's fingers gripping at his hair, softly whimpering and making such the cutest noises that it was driving Deidara insane.

"More…don't stop…Deidei!" He gave the raven what he wanted, suckling hard and taking every inch of him. It wasn't too long before Itachi came with a moan as Deidara happily swallowed his seed.

Itachi panted and was still squirming from the after effect, his breathing just now starting to calm down before Deidara turned him over and spread his cheeks apart; it was his turn to have his way.

Itachi's eyes widened at this, "Wha-what are you…" Deidara pressed his palm tongue against the tight ring and whispered, "Shhh… You'll thank me later un."

Itachi didn't agree with this at all and began to fight back whimpering, "No…it's dirty!" The artisan chuckled and cooed, "I know you're clean un." The tongue pressed against him once more, wriggling in to lick and lap up everything it could touch.

The raven was flushed red once more and gave in to the pleasure now. He was about to come again and gripping tightly to the blankets but didn't when Deidara stopped. Itachi whined a little from the loss of contact but the blonde fixed that problem.

He gently penetrated him, now that he was lubricated, and Itachi winced with a shudder. "Tell me when it stops hurting un." The raven frantically nodded and in no time he gave him the ok, rocking his hips against the artisan's member.

Itachi wasn't whining at all anymore as Deidara thrusted into his uke at moderate, hard pace. Deidara was enjoying this immensely, since he doesn't get to be seme too often and to Itachi no less. "D..De…Deidei!" Itachi came all over his chest and as the blonde tightened his grip onto his hips, trying to hold out as long as possible.

He lasted for about another minute before releasing himself deep into the Uchiha, riding the waves of his orgasm. He gently pulled out and cuddled up to the exhausted raven, "That felt good Deidei." "Yes it did un."

* * *

><p><span>Other POV<span>

I just walked past their room when I heard low moaning and giggled. I entered the other room with a grin and Sasori eyed me, "So what are they doing?" "You mean what they just did." Zetsu smirked, "They didn't?" "They did."

Kisame growled, "That's not fair! Itachi will do it with Deidara but not me?" "It makes sense Kisame. Itachi didn't think it was right that his papa touched him in a dirty way but with someone else it's ok. At least that's what Tobi thinks."

Hidan chuckled, "I bet Itachi thought blondie was a fucking girl!" That earned him a smack to the head by me, "What have I told you about referring to him as a girl?" He frowned and rubbed his head, "Not to. I'm fucking sorry babe."

I patted his leg, "Good boy." Kakuzu looked at the clock, "How long until the drug wears off?" Sasori sat in deep thought for a moment, "Anytime now." Right on cue, here he came around the corner with a livid expression.

"You all deserve to suffer for hours on end from humiliating me like this, however….." He trailed off and glanced off deep in thought until, "If you value your life don't disturb me."

"**What are you doing to do?" **Itachi replied with a matter of fact tone, "I'm going to reclaim my dignity from a certain blonde." He left with a smug grin and we all chuckled. "He took that better than we thought."

"Sempai going to get it." "I had a hunch Itachi wouldn't resist my brat." "No fucking joke." Kisame actually smirked, "I'm glad everything's back to normal. So does this mean we're done with the drug yet?"

Zetsu sighed, "Yes it does for the time being." Kakuzu groaned, "It'll reappear later on I have no doubt." Hidan nodded, "Ditto." Tobi grinned, "Tobi won't mind as long as he gets to be the parent next time."

I nodded, "Same here, but I want a certain red head as my baby and his nickname shall be Sassy." If looks could kill, I would've been dead ten times over from that glare Sasori was giving me.

A few chuckles were to be heard but they stopped once they got the same death glare from the puppet master. Kakuzu and Zetsu seemed to be the only ones to catch on to what I just did.

Now Sasori is sure to hide or dispose of that drug so that NEVER happens.

**The End! **

**Hope everyone enjoyed baby/nurse Itachi. Don't forget to review too **


	10. Chapter 2 Responses

**CHAPTER 2 TALLIED VOTES AND COMMENTS! LOA = loverofakatsuki (just so you know it's me )**

**LOA: First things first…uh, Kakuzu?**

**Kakuzu: Yes?**

**LOA: Well, someone actually answered the example I gave last time about 'who would you sleep with other than your two lovers?'**

**Kakuzu (glares): They didn't...**

**LOA: Yeah, well we got a response and I got to post it.**

**Kakuzu (facepalms): Fine, what'd they say?**

**LOA: User 'lol' said you would sleep with Pein.**

**Kakuzu (jaw drops): WHAT? He's not even here! **

**LOA: I know that, sheesh, I am the author you know. **

**Kakuzu: User 'lol', I have no clue how you came up with that but, I regret to inform you that he's not my type.**

**LOA: I know who is ^-^**

**Kakuzu: Not another word from you LOA. Get on with the vote results.**

**LOA (grins): Anyway, thank you 'lol' for answering the question and let's move on.**

* * *

><p><strong>*Alright, I hope everyone's ready for the outcome of last chapter's question: Which 3 akatsuki members do you think has the biggest cocks? <strong>

**(I voted Kisame/Kakuzu/Zetsu)**

**Here are the results: Kisame&Kakuzu=6, Hidan=3, Tobi/Itachi/Pein=2, Zetsu/Deidara/Sasori=1**

**Our winners are Kisame, Kakuzu, and Hidan ;)**

**Kisame (big grin): I'm happy that you readers have the sense to know I have a big cock that's not to be reckoned with XD.**

**Kakuzu (smirks): Don't like the fact that I tied with Kisame but I'm proud that you readers know I'm a big man for a reason.**

**Hidan (whips his out with a cocky grin): I knew you fuckers would vote for me to have one of the biggest cocks. It's fucking obvious and I show it with pride!**

**LOA: We can see that, now put it back Hidan, the readers don't need to see that right now.**

***Hidan ignores the author and jerks off***

* * *

><p><strong>LOA: Now I wish you readers didn't vote for him; the fame has gone to his head….both heads O.O<strong>

**Tobi (claps hands): Tobi didn't win but Tobi glad 'mmteku123 & Miaka Uzumaki' think he has big cock! *lowers voice* Tobi does you know ;)**

**Itachi (slight smirk): Thank you user 'lol & sweetdreams705' for your votes. Another thing for an Uchiha to have pride in.**

**Pein (sighs): It's about time someone mentioned me, thanks 'Max & Sb30' for considering me even though I'm not in the stories.**

**LOA: Don't worry. You'll be coming in soon, I just don't know when yet.**

**Sasori (blank): I hate you all, except for 'Sb30' who gladly voted for me. Just because I have a puppet body does NOT mean I don't have a big cock. *beckons Sb30 over* To show my appreciation for your vote, we're going to have some fun. Of course, you're being the uke *winks***

**Deidara (scowls): At least 'Max' thinks I have a big cock, which can't be said for the rest of you lot un. I'm just glad I got a vote….and Max? I hate to break this to you, but we are going to create some art together…..physically un. You won't mind if I'm the seme since you're in for a world of pleasure un. *smiles seductively***

**Zetsu (sniffs): **No one thinks we have a big cock except for 'LOA' and she's the author!** Well fuck them, we'll just fuck LOA's brains out to make up for the lost votes!**

***LOA blushes nervously and tries to ignore the hungry gaze she's getting from Zetsu***

**LOA: Uh, that concludes the votes so, hope everyone liked the responses from the akatsuki and the nex….WHAT THE HELL!**

**Tobi (laughing): Tobi will finish since Zetsu sempai just glomped LOA and is…uh….wow, Tobi getting turned on now O.O**

**Anyway, LOA going to post next question at end of next chapter that she is currently working on. **

**ByeBye and remember, TOBI'S A GOOD BOY!**


	11. Chapter 3 Responses

**Tobi: Hey, where's LOA at sempai?**

**Deidara: Don't know, probably too sore to come in lol un.**

*In shuffles in LOA, clutching her aching body from Zetsu's previous sexual attack*

**LOA: I'm finally here so stop laughing at me Deidara. He DID fuck my brains out; I couldn't remember a thing after the fourth time. My body couldn't take any more of that abuse.**

**Zetsu: Don't lie, you fucking loved what I did to you. I made you a woman four times over. **It's too bad you passed out when you did, we were about to drug you to keep you going for another round or two.

**LOA: Drop the subject please so we can get on with the reviews.**

**Zetsu: Fine. **Alright.

*LOA glances around nervously (that was too easy so now she's worried about what'll happen next*

* * *

><p><strong>LOA: Anyway~ let's get on with this. Ok, I apologize in advance to all my curious readers about last chapters question: 'Who do you think is the hottest Akatsuki member?'<strong>

**Well, that question was fairly difficult to answer and it's hard just to pick one so guess what?**

***Overall score: EVERYONE IN THE AKATSUKI IS FREAKING HOT! Leave it at that***

**Kisame: Now since that obvious answer is out of the way, here's a question to the Akatsuki and author from 'Good boy-chan.' **

*If you could have sex with ONLY ONE other member of the Akatsuki, who would it be?*

**Tobi: Well that's easy. Tobi pick Zetsu!"**

**Deidara: …..Danna *blushes***

**Hidan: What kind of fucking question is this? Don't they read these fanfics? Whatever, I would fuck the old man.**

**Kakuzu: Despite how much he pisses me off it would be the cocky, whiny, cursing jashinist.**

**Kisame *blushes also*: The beyond a doubt, gorgeous raven Itachi.**

**Itachi *hiding his smile and blush*: Kisame.**

**Zetsu: **My good boy Tobi of course. **Pfft, who the hell else could it be?**

**Sasori: My blonde brat, even though his view of art is still wrong.**

**LOA: Shit, that's a hard question. Um….I withdraw.**

**Hidan: FUCK NO! You better fucking answer this right now!**

**Sasori: If we had to do it, so do you.**

**LOA: FINE! It's either Hidan or Kakuzu.**

**Kakuzu: That's not good enough LOA, you have to choose ONE.**

**Hidan: I bet it's me, who wouldn't want to have fucking sex with me than anyone else.**

**Kakuzu: Why would she want a loud mouthed crybaby like you? She wants a man in bed that's gentle and yet firm.**

**Hidan: How would you fucking know Kakuzu? For all you know she has a thing for young Jashinists and not an old man that's in his ninety's.**

*Both immortals about to engage in combat until Deidara pulls them apart*

**Deidara: Both of you just shut up and let her answer already un!**

**LOA: I know I'm going to regret this….…Kakuzu.**

**Hidan: WHAT!**

**Kakuzu *grins happily*: Told you idiot. As for you LOA, I'll show you after the reviews that you didn't chose wrong.**

* * *

><p>*LOA blushes like crazy and tries to avoid Hidan's glares*<p>

**Tobi: Tobi read next question. Ooooh, this is for Zetsu sempai from 'MyMidnightShadow'!**

**Zetsu: **Really? What does it say Tobi?

*How far does your black and white line goes? Does your *** have it too?*

**Zetsu: DAMN! I knew someone would ask that. **Oh well, it's actually no big deal. Yes it's true. **However, instead of taking our word for it, you're going to find out first hand that it's true after the reviews are done!**

**LOA: You asked for that one 'MyMidnightShadow'**

**Itachi: I'll read the last question. This is for all Akatsuki members and possibly Olivia from 'sweetdreams705'.**

* * *

><p>*If there was one scene that you could change (in any story that LOA has made for the Akatsuki and Olivia) what would you replace it with, like in your own mind Akatsuki members, what do you think should've happened instead?*<p>

**Tobi: That's a real good question. In 'Birthday surprise' Tobi wanted to give Olivee more than just a lap dance for her birthday *pouts.* Tobi thinks he should've gotten to take her into the bedroom for another 'lollipop demonstration.'**

**Deidara: My issue that I would like to change is the 'Mystery drink." I wanted to be the vampire and not some damn doll un! I bite her and then take her to bed un. That would've been so sexy with me as a vampire un!"**

**Itachi: I rather the scene on 'Prevention Failure' with me had been more interesting. I only got to rub her back with lotion that enhanced her libido and that was it. What should've happened is after that happened, I fondled and attacked her with a vibrator…or something sexual. Let's face it, this Uchiha hasn't had much action as of late.**

**Kisame: Good question indeed. My beef is one thing, I NEVER got to be part of a gangbang! On the 'Seven days' story, LOA should've added another bonus chapter with the others that didn't get to join in, including myself, to have one HUGE gangbang. It's not fucking fair so I better get one sometime!"**

**Sasori: The only scene I can complain about is on "Seven days' when I was dared to admit my view of art was wrong and it was fleeting and not eternal. It made me sick that I had to do that and the readers read that too! I'd change the dare to something else that did NOT concern my art!**

**Kakuzu: Let's see, I would have to say that on 'Prevention Failure' that I should NOT have been under the impression of Olivia being dead AT ALL. That highly infuriated me and I was NOT amused, even when she turned out to be ok. I rather it been, after she lost the baby (pains me to say that) she be upset then got visited by Jashin through in her sleep and the rest unfold like it did. **

**Zetsu: How come I didn't get to fuck Tobi on 'Baby Uke's" yet? **I only got to jerk my boy off, and the others got to take their lovers so what's up with that? **I change the part that after we jerked him off, we pounded the hell out of him against the bathroom door!"**

**Hidan: I agree with you 'sweetdreams705,' on 'Gender Bender Fun' I KNOW how to fucking change that scene when the jutsu wore off and I tried to tackle her until that fucking miser took her from me and HE got to have the fun! This is how it's should've fucking happened: Once it wore off, I was going to grab and suck on those tits and fuck her right there on the couch in front of everyone. They could jerk off for all I care just as long as I got to fuck her and made her moan my name for more fucking.**

**Olivia: Yay, I get to be a part of this review. Hmmm, I can't think of a scene in particular to change, aside from that creepy 'Blood Lust' scene with Zetsu. I do have one thing to say: WHAT'S WITH ME GETTING DRUGGED ALL THE TIME? I mean sheesh, every time I turn around someone's slipping something into my drink or injecting me. I find it hilarious too but give me a break LOA!**

* * *

><p><strong>*<strong>LOA facepalms and quickly grabs the last question before the akatsuki force her to change those scenes with Zetsu hovering over her with lust in his eyes.*

**LOA: Ok, this question is for Olivee I think. 'Sb30' has been DYING to know this so here we go.**

*****If you weren't lovers with Kakuzu or Hidan, then who would be the next best thing?*

**Olivia: Wow, wasn't expecting that one. Hmmm, I'd say...Tobi.**

**Hidan: Are you fucking serious? You're not replacing us with anyone!**

**Kakuzu: Shut up Hidan, it's not going to happen so drop it. Like he could compare to us anyway.**

**Olivia: Both of you be quiet and stop downing on my Tobi. We're VERY close and I love that boy so that's that!"**

*Tobi grabs Olivee and lip locks her, "Tobi knew you wanted him!" "TOBI YOU SORRY FUCKER!" There goes Hidan chasing Tobi with his scythe*

**LOA: With that aside, enjoy the next chapter.**

**Kakuzu: You're coming with me LOA remember?**

**LOA: …..oh my!**

**Zetsu: **Come along 'MyMidnightShadow.' Time to thoroughly answer your question. **By fucking of course *smiles seductively***

*Ending with LOA being thrown onto the bed by Kakuzu and 'MyMidnightShadow' being taken into the bathroom for the obvious sexual fun that's about to happen from Zetsu lol*


	12. Chapter 4 Responses

*In skips a VERY satisfied/smiling LOA clutching her review clipboard*

**LOA: HELLO my fine readers, sorry for the delay on the review chapter but it's here.**

**Hidan: Where the fuck have you been?**

**Itachi: We KNOW where's she been and why she's so giddy right now.**

**Kakuzu: Have you forgotten that she was with me. ;)**

**Hidan: :-: I fucking hate all of you! **

**LOA: Don't be like that Hidan, you'll get to have your epic sex.**

**Hidan: You fucking promise?**

**LOA: I fucking promise (no pun intended lol) Anywho let's start off the reviews. Take it away Sasori my man!**

* * *

><p><strong>Sasori (rolls his eyes): Don't call me that LOA. Aside from that, we have two questions from 'mmteku123'. Question one:<strong>

*Who is the most seme out of the Akatsuki?*

**Itachi: That rules us uke's out.**

**Sasori: Damn, safe to say it's not me due to my small physique.**

**Deidara: It's alright Danna, you're the most seme to me un.**

**Sasori (clears throat): At least I can count on my lover on that.**

**Zetsu: **I believe I qualify to be the most seme. **How can I not be?**

**Kisame: Like hell Zetsu, if anyone is the most seme it would be me! I'm the tallest and most masculine out of the Akatsuki.**

**Kakuzu: Not quite Kisame, I'm the most seme. You may be a tad bit taller and muscular than myself however, my deep voice obviously makes me the most seme AND the manliest. **

**LOA: Hmmm, you do have a point Kakuzu. That sexy voice of yours does give you an edge, however, Kisame is the tallest and most masculine so that takes into account, and Zetsu's split personality makes him as much seme as you two. **

**Zetsu: Thanks LOA! **

**LOA: No problem. As for the most seme, I'd say there's not quite a one choice though. It'd be between Kisame, Kakuzu, and Zetsu. **

**Sasori: Figures it'd be one of those three, the most seme doesn't have to have the largest cock you know. It's how you use it to satisfy your lovers. **

**LOA: VERY good point. Ok I change my mind, ALL of you are the most seme in your own different/unique ways XD**

* * *

><p><strong>Sasori: Glad you finally see it my way so let's hurry up and finish this chapter. Question 2:<strong>

*****Will there ever be the time where Deidara, Tobi, Itachi, and Olivia be hardcore seme to their lovers?*

**Olivia&Tobi: YES! **

**Deidara: We've already discussed this with LOA and it's only fair that all us uke's get to be in ultimate control over our seme's un. ;)**

**Hidan: FUCK YEAH! I've been dying to fuck the hell out of Kakuzu for a while now. That miser has NO idea what's coming to him **

**Itachi: I'm rather looking forward to that myself, I can be quite forceful when I have to be.**

**LOA: OK~ On to the next question:**

* * *

><p><strong>*<strong>Hey Hidan, I know your usually the 'uke', but have you ever fucked kakuzu? as the seme?  
>Love, captain awesome.<p>

**Hidan: Yes, yes I fucking have. But the fucking miser won't let me top him NEAR as much as I fucking want to! Stingy bastard! A REAL mean can take it up the ass like I can. OW! **

**Kakuzu (just smacked his lover upside the head): I hardly let you for the simple fact that you boast and brag about it to everyone when I do let you top me. A real man doesn't beg to be fucked raw up the ass by his lover!**

**Tobi: Tobi better read next question before a yelling match happens. This is from 'lexypink1' for Tobi's Zetsu.**

* * *

><p>*Is Zetsu able to have a threesome with when he splits?*<p>

**Zetsu: **I don't know, I've never tried. **It might work but since we don't have a fucking clue, why don't we try it out on 'lexypink1'? **That's a splendid idea.

*Zetsu literally drags poor 'lexypink1' into a bedroom to experiment. I hope they have fun though XD*

**LOA: Is it just me or has Zetsu attacked someone on every review chapter so far?**

**Zetsu: HELL YES! **I'm a BAD boy sometimes.

**Itachi: Next question. This is a doozy from 'lolXP':**

* * *

><p>*This is like a question and story request cause I would love to read your version of this anywho...If LOA version found a smart mouth 6 yr old girl and adopts her into the family what would they do? (even olivee &amp; they do luv the lil girl ;)) Sex can be involved in the story like she walks in on them or something*<p>

**LOA: Holy Jashin, I don't know!**

**Hidan: Holy Jashin, what the fuck? The answer is no, that girl would be SO traumatized if she lived with all these fuckers. **

**Tobi: Tobi and Olivee would love the little girl and adopt! **

**Olivee: Sounds good to me Tobi, but don't forget at some point I'm having a jashinist or two.**

**Kakuzu: No, no way in hell are we doing that. We can't afford the expense! **

**Itachi, Zetsu, Deidara, and Sasori: Find her a NORMAL family that will take her in (un).**

**Kisame: Nah, if that happened she could stay with us for a while though she might get beaten up if she has a smart mouth like Hidan.**

**LOA: Okay~ on to six questions from 'MyMidnightShadow' SIX! OMJ you trying to cramp my fingers on this computer? Kidding XD, let's get to it. Question 1:**

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><p>*To Deidara: Would you ever fuck Tobi? You are his SEMPAI after all.*<p>

**Deidara (sweatdrop): I knew that question would come up. *sighs* Believe it or not, despite how much he aggravates me (though not NEAR as much as before) I would fuck him. I'd be the seme of course un.**

**Tobi: Awww, Tobi never knew his sempai had the hots for Tobi *blushes***

**Deidara: No comment un.**

*Question 2 for Tobi: How did Madara get into you? O.O

**Tobi: Um, Tobi can't really remember. He snuck up on Tobi and threw him on the ground then Tobi blacked out.**

*Question 3 for Madara: Why Tobi?*

**Hidan: Don't include that fucker to show up in the reviews!**

**Madara: Shut the hell up Hidan, this Uchiha is on the verge of appearing more in these stories from now on or LOA is going to feel my wrath.**

**LOA: As long as your wrath doesn't include what's in your pants; I can't much more of that lol.**

**Madara: You know you want it LOA. As for the question, why NOT Tobi. He's actually the perfect choice for a host body when I needed one. Who in their right minds who EVER suspect a childish boy like him to contain one of the most dangerous shinobi of all time.**

**LOA: ….Don't get ahead of yourself Madara O.O Next question 4:**

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><p>*Hidan: What would you do if Kira and Olivia met?*<p>

**Hidan (facepalms): What the fuck? That's two different stories concerning different crap. It won't fucking happen so I don't have to worry about a thing. If it did and Olivia found out, I'd be in fucking shit hole!**

**Olivia: You hit the nail on the head baby.**

**LOA: That's a little awkward so let's change the mood:**

*Question 5 for LOA: Would you write a story with all the OC's letting?*

**LOA: …..Letting? I think I know what that means Xl, I doubt it. Too much work for me, I have enough on my hands as it is. **

*****Question 6 for Kisame: I challenge you to Dance Dance Revolution. XP*

**Kisame: That's not even a statement but I'll answer it. *glances around and whispers* I accept your challenge; I can cut a rug believe it or not.**

**Tobi and Olivee: WE LOVE THE DOOM SONG! We know what you talking about in that review and saw Invader Zim. Funny as shit!**

**LOA: Alrighty Maxie boy, you're up ;) OMJ, 5 question from you? I already know this is going to be a pip. (And yes, Maxie IS a good reviewer XD)**

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><p>*Question 1 to Zetsu: Where in the world do you keep your garden?*<p>

**Zetsu: Why is he asking us that? **Considering we end up providing herbs and assisting Sasori with the drugs, it's a very simple question. **I guess. **

If you must know Max, we have a secret portal in our room and take it to our VERY private location of the garden.** That's all the info you're getting, we can't tell you the exact whereabouts for obvious reasons.**

*Question 2 for Olivia: Have you ever considered taking a rape prevention class? Just a suggestion... *Cough* hint *Cough*

**Olivia: I've thought about it but I won't be able to. It costs money and I get my allowance from Kakuzu…..you should know what that means.**

**Kakuzu: She's not taking the class Max. It's too expensive and she's got me and Hidan to protect her. **

**Hidan: If we're not fucking around, I told her to kick the guy in the crotch and jab him hard enough in the fucking eyes to blind him.**

**Olivia: That would work but don't forget what happened in 'Unwanted Visitor.' Doesn't always work you know. **

**LOA: Don't worry Olivia, just have them teach you self defense, they can do that much. Rather Tobi teach you though, those two will get too rough.**

*Question 3 for Tobi: (holds out a can of red bull) Would Tobi like a special drink?

**Tobi (shakes head): Sorry Max, Zetsu banned Tobi from red bull. Tobi can't have it anymore after what happened last time he drank too much of it. Tobi was a bad boy and got angry instead of hyper. He smacked Zetsu and punched him in the crotch and laughed about it. **

**Zetsu: I punished him severely for that too Max so don't tempt him! **Tobi's a good boy and needs to stay that way.

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><p>*Question 4 for Kisame: *gives you hug and kiss on cheek* I'm sure you'll get to gangbang soon. I know it's not a question, but I feel sorry for you.<strong>*<strong>

**Kisame: *glomps Max* You hear that LOA, give me the gangbang already! Max knows I deserve it and he doesn't need to feel sorry for me. LOA will need the pity if I don't get some more action soon. **

**LOA (hides in a corner): You'll get the gangbang so don't hurt me. **

*Question 5 for Deidara: Do you brush your hand mouths? Also, can you taste with your hands? P.S Your view of art is right! Nobody wants the stare at the same piece of art forever.*

**Deidara: Never thought someone actually would ask me this un. Yes, occasionally I do brush/wash my hand mouths for the simple fact that they get dirty like the rest of the body un. I use them for sex too so why NOT clean them right un? No, I do NOT taste with my hands or I'd be tasting that damn clay all the time, who wants that un? **

…**Of course my view of art is right and I know you added that to make up for the silly questions you asked me. I actually don't mind and guess what Max, you and I are going to express our views of art RIGHT NOW UN!" **

**Kisame: You're not having all the fun this time Deidara!**

*Deidara and Kisame both glomp and strip Max's clothes off right in front of LOA and proceed to *clears throat* have a hardcore threesome.*

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><p><strong>Hidan: Who's fucking reading the last question LOA?<strong>

**LOA:….**

**Hidan: LOA?**

**LOA: …**

**Hidan: I'm FUCKING TALKING TO YOU LOA!" **

**LOA: That's nice**

**Hidan (facepalm): LOA obviously is enjoying watching the threesome and doesn't fucking care who reads the next question so this jashinist is going to. It's from 'sb30'.**

*My question for the lovely author, could you give us a hint on your next possible story? Or are you not planning to make another soon? :D

**Hidan: FUCK! **

*Scoops up LOA and forces her to focus on the screen*

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><p><strong>LOA: Alright Hidan I get it. Let's see, ooooh, 'sb30' want a sneak peek'. Ok listen up my naughty readers, here's the scoop. I do have a story in mind that is going to be my next one, however I don't know when as of yet I'll be writing it. <strong>

**I'm planning on finishing baby uke's and unwanted first, then try to do the four/five requests I got (not sure if I'm going to do anymore requests after this O.O) Anywho, here's the next story (of mine) that I'm going to do: **

**Something happens to Tobi, how I don't know yet, and he's now a….VAMPIRE! In this, one by one someone falls prey to his seductive charm (or whoever he turns) and the remainders have to fix him and quick before everyone gets turned by master Tobi.**

**I know who gets turned but you readers have to wait for the LEMONY fun!**

**Tobi: YAY! Tobi always wanted to be a vampire. Does Tobi gets to seduce Olivee and sempai?**

**LOA: I can't tell you Tobi, you'll find out when the story gets written**

**Tobi: Tobi can't wait and better practice. Oh Olivee~! **

**Olivia (runs): Back you bad vampire! I'm not practicing.**

**Tobi (gets Olivee trapped in corner): But Olivee, Tobi a GOOD vampire!**

**LOA: Well 'sb30' I hope you're happy. The whole vampire thing has gone to his head and now he's on the prowl lol. It's ok, he'll get over it.**

**Hope you readers enjoy the final chapter once I find out who's going to be Olivia's baby boy from the votes and now if you'll excuse me, there's a threesome I'd like to continue watching. **


End file.
